What do you want?
by Ilovedensi1711
Summary: When things begin to fall apart, Kensi and Deeks have to decide what they really want. I do not own any of the characters of this amazing show. Reviews are always loved!
1. Chapter 1

"Kensi!" Deeks shouted.

"What?" Her eyes full of tears. Her heart breaking she couldn't catch her breath between sobs.

"You know these are doctored, Right? Kens, you know that ,right baby?"

"I don't know what I know right now, Deeks. I...I just need you to go right now. I can't do this. I need some space."

Deeks heart sunk. After everything the last 12 years, how could she believe any of this. He and Kensi had been married for over a year now. March 10, 2019 was the best day of their lives. Surrounded by friends and family on the beach. Blush dresses, cornflower blue carnations and white roses, the ocean, the sun, even a short but sweet surprise appearance by Hetty, who wouldn't miss it for the world. Everything was perfect. They continued Field work and close calls came and went. Deeks was fighting hard to stay respectful as Kensi seemed to be Inching closer to getting out, but something kept holding her back. Frustration was overcoming the man, who wanted to start a family before he began seeing his luscious blonde locks turn grey.

Deeks grabbed his bag and looked bag at her one last time before walking out the front door. He leaned up against it and whispered, "I love you princess."

He headed over to the bar. It was well after lockup, his and Kensi's fight crept well into the morning hours. Unlocking the entrance, he wasn't surprised to see Callen tinkering with transponders trying to get a signal into Russian prisons, still searching for his father.

"Any luck yet?" Deeks questioned hoping to avoid why his presence at the bar was occurring at 2 in the morning.

Callen eyes him suspiciously, "couldn't sleep?"

"Something like that."

"What's really going on Deeks?"

"Like you said couldn't sleep, thought I'd run through the inventory," he shrugged hoping Callen would buy it.

"Not buying it," Callen retorted.

"No? Really? I thought that was pretty convincing."

"I am a skilled agent, you know."

"Do I?"

"Cut with the games Deeks, what's up?"

Deeks sighed knowing he wouldn't win this battle.

"So," Callen eyed the tired man over, "cut to the chase, Shaggy. What's up?"

"I don't even know where to begin." He mumbled putting his hands through his mane.

Callen headed behind the bar and grabbed two cold beers. "Here you look like you need this," he handed one to Deeks, "besides it's on the house." He winked with a smile.

"Ya it is," Deeks replied.

"So spill, why are you here and not home with Kensi."

Deeks mind wondered back.

Flashback three months ago...

"Kensi! G I don't have a shot!" Sam screamed through coms.

"Sam! What's going on, talk to me." Deeks demanded.

"We got eyes on her, Deeks, but I don't have a clear shot." Sam replied frantically

"How is she, Sam!" When he didn't respond, Deeks returned, "I'm coming around back,"

"Be careful man, focus, your emotions will get her killed." Sam needed to prepare him for what he would witness.

Kensi was being held up by Edwards. He was holding her lifeless body in front of him blocking Sam and Callen from taking a clean shot. Her hands bound behind her back, bruised, beaten and bloody, her eyes black and blue, blood streaming down her face, a vision of an op that was spiraling downward quickly.

Kensi always had a soft spot for Wayward Marines with PTSD, this time it almost got her killed, yet again. Sargent Edwards was accused of selling troop locations to the Taliban. He was shot multiple times in the leg and back in Afghanistan two years ago, barely surviving. He was honorably discharged and recovered at home, until the nightmares became too much. Too many of his friend and colleagues only made it home in bodybags from the senseless was overseas. His girlfriend left him not prepared to deal with his ups and downs. He was alone, he was tired of the deaths and saw this as a way to give the Taliban an upper hand, hoping it would keep them moving away from our troops, while making him some cash to start a new life. His vision was clouded from his disorder and lack of support. Kensi realized he wasn't a bad man, just caught up in the disasters that hit him hard in a country of war.

Kensi was assigned to go under cover to begin dating Edwards. He hung out at a local bar, where he seemingly met his contacts. She was to get close enough to him so that she could search his house for information. She was equipped with a sedative to prevent any indiscretions, in case Edwards wanted to progress things during the op. This would also give her a chance to find evidence without being made. Kensi found it easy to relate to the man with her past experiences. Deeks was unhappy with the assignment. A wrong move would put Her in serious danger, but Kensi felt confident she could get through to the target.

Prior to the mission, Deeks expressed his opinion.

"You know I have to do this." Kensi spoke softly.

"You don't have to."

"Deeks, I'm perfect for this op and you know it."

"Doesn't mean I have to like it."

"No, but I need you to support it. I need you to have my back."

Deeks wants to scream at her and beg her again to get out. He had been ready for a while and had been trying to patiently wait for her to say it was time. Each day passed, another close call, another case, over and over, with no end in site. Yet he kept his promise, being patient with her. But the clock was ticking and it became harder and harder to not break his word.

He pulled her into his arms, " I always will support you."

She went about her mission. Sam, Callen and Deeks were always in the backdrop, until they weren't.

A few weeks into the mission, Kensi succeeded in seducing the Marine. They headed back to his apartment. She slipped him the sedative and he was out. Kensi gave the guys the all clear.

"He'll be out for at least 6-8 hours with that dose." She informed her backup.

"Kens, I'm not leaving!"

"Don't be an idiot, what are you gonna do stand outside looking homeless. This is too ritzy an area for that, you'll likely tip off the neighbors. Go with Callen and Sam, I'll be fine!"

"I don't like this."

"Deeks, the bar is literally two blocks away. You'll be close enough if I need you."

With that they headed back to the bar down the road to ask questions about Edwards and his meetings.

"She'll be fine Deeks," Callen started.

"I have a bad feeling."

"Maybe it's your late night sleep snacking on left overs, that's got your stomach churning," Sam teased.

"Guys, I'm being serious."

"Let's get our questioning done and get back then, Shaggy," Sam patted his back.

Kensi began searching his apartment. However, the sedative didn't last as it should have and mixed badly with the concoctions of medications he was on for his PTSD. He woke suddenly in a fit of rage. Seeing his date snooping on his computer made matters worse.

"Who are you!" He screamed punching her in the face.

"I was just checking my email," she tried to lie.

Edwards grabbed her and threw her against the wall, Kensi regained her balance and began fighting him, shoving him back into his desk where reached for his gun he kept hidden there. Kensi began to grab hers but he beat her to the punch.

"Guys, a little help here," she whispered out and went silent as Edwards pistol whipped her and suddenly everything went black.

No one planned for the unexpected results and that the sedative would have interacted they way it did. Everything was mapped out and planned to a tee, but as they were well aware, sometimes plan A failed.

"Deeks stay here and finish questioning," Sam ordered.

"The hell I am! Kensi's in trouble."

"Deeks, you're too close."

"And you're wasting time!"

Sam all too familiar knew what Deeks was feeling. His argument stopped and The three headed back to Edwards' apartment complex. Edwards had continued kicking Kensi after she blacked out. Lifting her head and punching her in an attempt to wake her and get answers to no avail. Realizing he had possibly an unconscious cop in his midst, he needed to act fast. He was dragging Kensi down the back alley, when Sam, Callen and Deeks pulled up. Sam and Callen went around back to the alley. Deeks was already through the front doors of the building and half way to the entrance to the alley when Sam yelled.

"Without warning, Deeks burst through the doors into the back of the alley. He saw Edwards holding Kensi's body. Seeing as he was behind Edwards, he aimed for the back of Edwards leg, hoping the pain would distract him long enough to get Kensi out of harm's way.

"Eric get us a bus here NOW, make that two!" Callen shouted.

Edwards grasped the back of his leg and howled in pain, dropping Kensi's body into a crumpled pile, giving Sam a shot to his shoulder. Callen cuffed him and waited for the ambulances.

Deeks ran to Kensi. "Baby, please baby, I'm here. Stay with me Kens. I love you so much. I can't do this without you."

Her limp body lay in his arms. Sam came over and found her weak pulse. He looked at Deeks, "Hang on Kensi,"Sam whispered.

"Deeks, Earth to Deeks, you gonna snap out of your thoughts and tell me what's going on or you gonna sit there and milk your beer."

"Huh, oh ya," he looked down at his warming beer. "I was just thinking back to the Edwards' case."

Callen's eyes dimmed. "That was close."

"Too close." His heart hurt thinking back again to the agony of waiting by her bedside again.

"I hate this place," he told Callen and Sam as they wondered the halls of the VA hospital. "The smell, the walls, the waiting." The ambulance brought her back to the place Kensi hoped to never see again. She spent many nights in this hospital receiving from the incident in Syria.

"She fought through once, she'll do it again." Sam said. "hell you got blown up by a rocket launcher and suffered just as bad of a TBI and she has," He continued trying to make his Shaggy haired friend crack a smile.

"And you didn't have to drag her through a 100 degree desert." Callen added.

"I shouldn't have left."

"Deeks you can't beat yourself up." Sam knew his word were hallow, he shouldn't have assumed Michelle had been driving, they may have been able to save her if he just thought clearer.

"I wanted to stay. Why is she so stubborn."

"Because she's Kensi." Callen reminded, " which means she'll make it through this."

"How many times, how many times can we really make it through?"

Sam and Callen looked at each other, Fearful Deeks was finally going to break.

Just then the doctor came out, "I can't say I'm pleased to see you again. That woman must have some angel watching over her."

"I think she has a few, Doc," referencing Granger, her dad and even David Suraff.

"She's very lucky. She's beginning to wake up. She has two broken ribs on her left side and one on the right. Thankfully none of the ribs broke far enough to puncture her lungs."

Callen shuttered, remembering the awful Pain he was in and how it was to breathe in Mexico when his lung was punctured by his ribs.

"We set her nose, stitched up her few deep wounds, she'll need at least two months to recuperate. Knowing Kensi, she'll be good as new in six weeks."

"Thanks Doc."

"And Mr. Deeks, I don't want to see either of you back here. That's doctor's orders."

He cracked a small grin. "Ok."

Deeks looked up at Callen and back at his beer, still barely touched. He sighed deeply. "It could have been worse. She almost died. He beat her within an inch of her life and she only had a few broken ribs and a severe concussion. I know she's Wonder-Woman, but when is enough enough?"

Callen knew Deeks was ready to start a family, but Kensi kept wavering. Callen feared The Edwards' case was certainly going to leave a huge doubt of continuing on, in Deeks mind. He finally decided to pry more.

"Is that what this is about?"

"What? No , no not at all, well I guess not directly."

"Then What Deeks?"

Finally Deeks handed over the envelope. "These, these are what this is all about."


	2. Chapter 2

"Before you call Sam over and the two of you kick my ass, it's not what it looks like," Deeks looked up with his blue eyes deeply distressed. His eyes summed to dim to a mix of blue and grey, filled with sadness, fear, hurt, anger and despair.

"Explain," Callen looked angry, but willing to hear the man out.

"These have obviously been doctored. And a poor job if I do say so myself."

"They look pretty convincing."

"Do you honestly believe I'd do that? Do you think I'd be so cold to hurt the woman I love more than life itself. If so, then none of you know me at all."

Callen knew the words Deeks spoke were true. He could see the photos were highly suspect, but he also knew Kensi would need some extreme convincing. She had been out of sorts since rushing back to work. Kensi was feeling better after a month. Being Kensi she pushed herself harder and harder. She became almost aggressive in everything she did, it was borderline reckless. As the doctor predicted, she was almost 100 percent by 6 weeks. Fully healed, but Callen kept her out of the field for an additional two weeks. She had been back a month now, but didn't hold back her aggression. It was almost as she felt she had something to prove. Even at home, Kensi was taking control. As soon as she was feeling better, she took it upon herself to practically attack Deeks one night. Not that Deeks truly minded, but he began to worry about Kensi's state when the same routine continued several nights in roll over the last few weeks.

Flashback...Kensi's return.

"Callen I'm ready. Why are you keeping me out another week!" Kensi was furious. She muffled through the first week of desk duty, but wasn't hearing she would have to do the same for a second week.

"Kens, baby give yourself some time. We all know you're your badass Blye self. But there's no need to rush."

"You just want me to quit! You're being selfish again. I'll tell you when I'm ready. I've told you that!"

"Kens, that's not what I meant. I just hate when you push yourself so hard."

"I'm fine!"

They all knew she was not fine. Fine was the word she used when she was definitely not fine. She stormed off to the gym. Taking her aggression out on the punching bag, Deeks cautiously approached her.

"I could have taken him Deeks. I should have taken him."

"Baby, he had a gun."

"And I should have been quicker to grab mine. I always have a plan B."

"No one thinks you have anything to prove. Why do you always do this to yourself."

"Because I have to prove it to myself Deeks!" She slumped down defeated.

"I get it, but,"

"No buts Deeks."

"Alright, I love you. Do you want me to work out with you?"

"I'm good, but thank you."

Later that night, was the first of many nights Kensi was asserting her force at home. Kensi was overzealous and ready to get what she needed from her husband.

Back at the bar, Callen decided they should call Eric in as he stared at the photos. "Alright, so we have Eric find the flaws and point them out to her."

"She should believe me, Callen."

"She hasn't been herself the last few weeks, maybe she just needs time to process. How did she get them."

"They were on her desk at work, I don't know who put them there."

"Another mole?" Callen raised his eyebrows.

"Let's hope not! Do you think she wants Time away from me? I'm her husband. I'm the one who should be helping her heal. She still never lets me in. For her to think I'd be unfaithful, I don't know if I can handle that."

"She's just reeling, Deeks. I'm confident you two can get through anything."

"I'm not so sure anymore Callen."

Kensi sat on their couch head buried in her hands. She has. I idea why she asked Deeks to leave. How could she accuse him of such things? How could she not believe him? In the almost 12 years they had known each other, he had only lied to her twice. Once keeping Boyle's murder from her and the second on Hetty's orders. She made him promise no more secrets and he kept that promise since. How could she doubt him. But the proof, the proof was in the pictures, wasn't it? He didn't tell her about the op he did without Callen and Sam. This is the way she found out about it. Pictures. Pictures that had consequences. Pictures that could destroy their happiness. She wasn't sure of anything anymore. Monty curled by Kensi's feet. The mutt was nearing 16 years old. His mangy fur nearly all white with wisps of brown still showing. He could no longer get his hind legs to bring him on the couch, so he nuzzled against the feet of his favorite human on the floor. Kensi has so many emotions running through her brain. She couldn't contain her feelings. Her tears streamed down. She honestly didn't know what to think. It was nearing 4 in the morning, and Deeks was still it home. She thought back to her first month home recovering after the Edwards' case.

"I don't have to go, babe. I can take family leave."

"Deeks, I'll be ok. My mom and your mom are stopping by and taking me to lunch and then I'll come home and rest until you get home."

"I don't want to leave you Kens. The only reason I'm still in is because of you."

"Please don't start with this Deeks. You know I'm not ready to leave yet. I get close and something pulls me back."

"Ya like this PTSD case that almost got you killed. Baby,"

"Deeks," she gave him a warning look.

"It's fine. I love working with you. It's just not the same without you."

"I'll be back in no time."

"I know Wonder Woman."

A month had past, and Kensi was ready to work.

"Two more weeks, Sugar Bear."

"Yup," she kissed him deeply. "Maybe tonight you can help me work out a bit," she winked.

"Oh girl! You got yourself a deal."

Kensi woke up with the next morning with a blanket on her. She glanced around but didn't see her husband anywhere. She crept upstairs and saw Deeks sleeping soundly in bed. She climbed in next to him.

"Hey," he woke up looking in her eyes.

"Why didn't you wake me when you got home?"

"It was late, you looked so peaceful."

"Oh" her eyes dropped a little. It was thoughtful of him to let her sleep, but He always wanted her in bed with him, yet he didn't tonight.

He snuck in a kiss which made he smile slightly. "I love you Kens."

"I love you too."

Deeks looked at Callen. "The only time we were together was on the case LAPD called me back for."

Flashback to the same evening Kensi fell asleep alone on the couch.

Deeks didn't get home til well after midnight that night. Kensi was sound asleep and Deeks didn't have the heart to wake her. She was lying in a tank top and underwear and must have fallen asleep on the couch waiting for him. He covered her with a blanket, gently kissed her cheek and headed to bed.

He didn't have the heart to tell her LAPD called him away today to work with DEA. Since they didn't have any pressing cases and Deeks was lacking his partner, Callen approved the mission. Of course when he arrived at LAPD to be debriefed, he was partnered with none other that Talia Decampo.

"How's the princess? Heard she took a rough beating."

"She's getting there. She'll be back in no time."

"Married life looks good on you, Marty. Still lookin good as ever."

"Not in the mood, Talia"

"Princess not being around getting to you?"

"Let's just get the job done."

"You're no fun Marty." She ran her hands through his hair.

SNAP, SNAP...

He shuffled away.

"What's wrong, you know I'm just playing."

"It's different now, Talia. I know you flirt with me to ruffle Kensi, but we are married now. It never felt right, but it feels almost disrespectful, especially when she's not here."

"You're right Deeks, I'm sorry. I really envy what you and Kensi have. She's actually a pretty amazing person."

"That she is."

Talia put out her hand to shake a truce, but pulled him into a hug instead,

SNAP, SNAP...

"Back to work Talia."

When Deeks got home, he didn't want to wake Kensi sleeping so peaceful, but he also didn't want to upset her by telling her Talia and he were partnered up today. Kensi trusted him with all her heart, but Talia's flirting often brought about the green eyed monster. Kensi needed to rest and recover and not go pick a fight with someone who didn't matter more than a co-worker on occasion.

"Hey man, I'm sorry. I should have said no." Callen felt a ping of guilt.

"Don't be ridiculous. You couldn't have known."

"You think she set you up?"

"Brother, I don't know what to think." He sighed.

"Good thing it's Friday. You wanna crash upstairs. You look beat."

"I'm not sure I could sleep if I tried. You?"

"I got my two hours of sleep, I'm up for the day."

Deeks shook his head in awe of his team leader. "Do me a favor?"

Callen looked up and nodded. "I'll send Sam to check on her," knowing what the broken man in front of him was thinking.


	3. Chapter 3

Deeks was still examining the photos. Now 6am, Callen had shot Eric and Sam a text.

"Eric will be here around 8:30, Sam's on his way."

"He wants to kick my ass before checking on Kensi?"

"No, he wants all the facts. Plus he doesn't want to wake her if she by chance fell asleep."

Deeks nodded. "I hope she got some rest."

"We gonna figure this all out."

"She normally trusts me, I can't understand why she's doubting me, my love for her. I feel like I did before we headed off to Mexico. I made a mess of everything back then, pushing her for a timeline. When all I really want to do is spend the rest of my life with her."

"She must have forgiven you then; she showed you how much she loved you there by hauling your half dead body through that desert."

"She probably wished she would have left me there to die now," he noted sadly.

"I highly doubt that's true, Deeks."

"I don't know. She's always had my back and now?"

"There wasn't as much to lose before, now it's permanent. She's probably not knowing how to feel," Sam said as he walked in.

"I guess. The hurt in her eyes. She didn't want to hear anything I had to stay."

"Give her time, Deeks, she'll come around. You're married now and that's a vow she won't take lightly."

"Your not gonna beat me to a pulp?"

"If I find out any of this is true, they'll have to use dental records to identify you."

"That might be hard since my teeth are a lovely veneer."

"Im glad you still have your sense of humor."

"Gotta keep something man, through this nightmare."

"Let me see these photos before I head to your house."

Sam began to look over the photos. One of Talia running her hands through Deeks' hair. The next one hugging Deeks. Sam looked up at the shaggy haired man.

Running his own hands through his mop, "those two are legit, she was being her flirty self at the start of our mission. I put a stop to it there. But, it's the next ones that sent Kensi over the edge."

The next one looked very much like Deeks and Talia in a heated kiss. Deeks face was very visible, while Talia's was a little blurred. The other two were Deeks seemingly in an even more intimate positions with the brunette. Again, the photos were not sharp quality, but left little to the imagination.

"Sam, I swear, I've never been in a position like these with Talia."

"And the kiss?"

"Let's just say, I've never kissed her like that. Hell, I've never kissed her."

Sam and Callen both eyed the man.

"She kissed me, in front of Kensi."

"Damn that chick has balls," Sam made light of the current dilemma.

"You believe me?"

"Listen Shaggy, I know you're an idiot, but even I don't think you're that big of an idiot to cheat on Kensi. And as much as you're doubting it, I highly doubt she believes that either, even if she's not saying right now."

"How do you figure?"

"Cause you're standing here," Sam shrugged with a grin. "I'm gonna make a stop and head on over there. Have Eric prove these ones are fake. I'll be in touch."

"Thanks Sam."

Kensi woke up and checked her phone. It was 645am. She was disappointed that she had no calls or texts from Deeks. She realized she had cried her self to sleep. She felt emotionally and physically exhausted. She flashed back to work earlier the night before.

"I'm glad today is over, I'm beat, I've been so exhausted lately."Kensi lamented.

"You kicked ass today, Kensilina."

"I don't know about that."

"Are you kidding me? I think you're 110 percent. Make that 150."

"I wish my body agreed with you. I'm sore and ready for bed."

Bed huh? Can you find a little adrenaline for me tonight, what do you think Sugar bear."

"If you're lucky."

"But, I wanna take the lead tonight," Deeks suggested.

"We'll see," she winked.

They stopped in the bullpen, when Kensi noticed a large Manila envelope on her desk.

"Ugh more paperwork!" She exclaimed. "How come you don't have any."

"I guess I'm just more efficient than you."

"At what? Slacking," She cackled loudly.

"I thought we talked about that laugh."

"You love it."

"I love you. Now grab the envelope and let's go."

They stopped and picked up dinner and headed home. After they ate, Kensi figured she'd get a start on the paperwork, so she wouldn't be overloaded tomorrow. Deeks had other things on his mind. He walked over kissing the spot on her neck that made her tingle.

"Let me take care of this," she held up the envelope, "then you can take care of me." Kensi teases. She opened the envelope shocked at what she saw. She dropped the picture as she saw the poses. Her eyes began filling with tears.

"Kens? What's wrong?"

All she could do was stare at her husband, who was completely lost.

"Kens?"

She remained silent. Deeks walked over and picked up the photos. The tears falling uncontrollably now.

"When?" She whispered.

"Kens!"

"What!" Her heart breaking between sobs.

"You know these are doctored right? Kens? You know that, right baby?"

"I don't know what I know right now." That's when she decided she needed him to leave for a while. She needed to collect her thoughts. She felt like she was going to vomit. She couldn't breathe, she didn't want to talk, she didn't want to fight. She just wanted some space Away from everything and everyone.

She snapped out of her flashback. Current disappointment reappeared. She thought he would have fought harder for them. She thought he'd be back by now. Maybe it was true, or maybe he was hurt she didn't believe him. She didn't know what to think. She didn't know what to do. Her stomach turned as she made it to the bathroom, her stomach lost the battle and she emptied any contents that were churning into the toilet. She felt a little better, got up and brushed her teeth, when she heard the door bell ring. Kensi had no clue who could be there, unless Deeks felt like he couldn't come in. She rushed down hoping that was the case.

"I come bearing gifts," Sam held up a coffee and box of donuts.

"Sam," she opened the door slightly disappointed.

"No smile for the donuts, it must be bad."

"He called you?"

"G did, he's at the bar with him."

"How is he?"

"Hasn't slept. U?"

"A few hours. How much do you know?"

"Enough, can I come in, or you want me to stand on the porch forever."

Kensi slid out of the way and let Sam enter.

The two sat on the couch. Kensi burst into tears. "I'm sorry Sam. I don't even know what's wrong with me," she mumbled as she stuffed a donut in her mouth. Half way through chewing it, she felt sick again. She ran into the bathroom and rid her body of the donut. She renters the living room.

"How long have you been sick, Kensi?"

"Just since I woke up. I've been crying so much, I feel ridiculous."

Sam stared at Kensi, who reached for another donut. She instantly felt sick again. "What am I doing? Why am I eating this when I just threw it up?" She sat the donut down.

Sam smiled and laughed slightly to himself.

Eric arrived right at 830. "Alright, let's take a look."

Deeks handed him the photos. He pointed out the two that were legit and then the three that were suspect.

Eric spent an hour examining the photos. "Deeks do you have any recent photos of you and Kensi?"

"Um, sure on my phone."

"Can I see them."

"Sure, if it'll help."

Most of the photos on Deeks' phone were selfies. He also had some the photographer sent from their wedding. Eric studied the phone and then the photos and back and forth repeatedly.

"I think someone shopped Talia's face on Kensi's body. You and Kensi ever been to the beach in these poses?"

Deeks blushed a bit.

"You really are a sex addict, Deeks!"

"Hey! Eh," he couldn't disagree. His ladybird loved her jungle cat. "Can you prove it to Kensi, that's the question."

"It be better if you had pictures of the two of you..."

"Ewe, Beale, No," Callen interrupted. "Somebody's obviously been watching you Deeks."

"Ya, the question is who?" He ruffled his locks.

"I guess that's our next task," Bealed chimed in, "case on deck."

"You wanna get some sleep before we get started?" Callen asked noticing Deeks eyes were puffy and heavy.

"I'm good," he said looking at his phone. His lock screen was of Kensi in her wedding dress. Her smile as wide as the ocean behind her.

"Text her, Deeks," Callen suggested.

"I don't even know what to say, Callen."

"Tell her the truth, that you love her."

Deeks nodded. He unlocked the screen and opened his messages taking Callen's advice, he typed, "I love you, Fern. I'll prove to you these aren't real, then we'll figure it out."

Kensi's phone vibrated making her jump a little. She looked down reading the message and quickly replied, "we always do."


	4. Chapter 4

"Kensi," Sam looked at her sincerely.

She was wiping her tears as she looked wide eye at him, reaching for another donut.

"Are you pregnant?"

"Wha...What?" She said dropping the donut before putting it to her lips.

"Are you pregnant? Is that a possibility?"

"I...I don't...I don't know. It didn't even cross my mind."

"You've been moody?"

"Ya, but that happens when I'm near my lady phase, as Deeks would say." She cracked a small grin.

"You're not thinking clearly, you're exhausted, your feeling sick, I have two kids Kens. I know the signs."

"We're always careful, well not lately, I guess. I haven't really been myself since," she paused. "I was trying to prove I was still my badass Blye self and I wasn't thinking. We just were doing."

Sam eyed her. " I thought I told you more being, less doing."

Kensi looked down, "it's not always easy, especially when you face death as much as we do."

Sam nodded, "Even being careful, I told you things happen, kids happen."

"Oh Sam, why are things such a mess." She began sobbing in his arms.

"Hey, Hey, this is a good thing."

"No, no, I...I Know, I mean it shouldn't be happening like this though. Not while we're fighting. While there's pictures of him with another woman."

"Kensi, those pictures are crap."

"You saw them?"

"I did. I don't buy it."

"This should be a happy moment for him and I, if I am."

"It will be Kens, do you want to find out."

"I don't know, Sam. This changes everything."

"That it does, how bout you find out for sure?"

Kensi nodded.

"I'll be back in a few."

"Sam?"

"Ya?"

"Thank you for being here."

"Anytime," with that he walked out the door. Sam pulled out his phone and texted Callen. "We might have a little hiccup, keep Deeks busy, I'll stay in touch."

Callen wasn't sure what to make of Sam's message, but he'd do as his partner asked. It wouldn't be hard to keep Deeks busy looking for the sender of the envelope.

"So where do we start?" Deeks questioned.

"Eric you're going to be heading back to the office to check through Security tapes. See if we can see who put the envelope on Kensi's desk." Callen stated.

"Got it," he paused and looked back "can I tell Nell?"

"Might as well have the whole gang involved," Deeks gave the ok to Eric. "Everyone can think I'm a scum bag, why not."

"we work better together," Eric blushed.

"Ah young love," Callen winked.

"Until it gets hard," Deeks lowered his head.

"By the way Deeks, I don't think you're a scum bag. I know you would never cheat On Kensi," With that Eric was gone back to OPS.

Sam returned to Kensi a half hour later. Kensi was frantically pacing the house. She couldn't sit still. Kensi grabbed the bag from Sam's hand and ran to the bathroom.

"Sorry," she yelled back, " and thank you."

"Just relax, Kens."

Kensi locked herself in the bathroom. She was a nervous wreck. Deeks would be thrilled if it was positive. His dream come true and their family to begin. But the timing, the fight, the pictures, she tried not to tear up. He should be there with her, waiting, wondering, she thought she should wait, but she didn't think she could. She looked at the box. A two test pack, She guessed Sam was being prepared. She sighed deeply. "Here goes."

20 minutes later, she relinquished from the bathroom. Sam looked at her with questioning eyes.

"I couldn't take it Sam, I'm sorry," she cried again. "He should be here with me waiting to see if he's going to be a father."

"I get it Kensi, but you need to find out sooner rather than later."

"I know. I just want him here. He deserves to be here."

"Why don't you go take a nap, Deeks. Let Eric and Nell do their thing and see what they can figure out. You're not gonna do anyone any good if you pass out from exhaustion."

"I don't know man."

"Go crash upstairs, I'll head over and check on Kensi and Sam."

"Thanks brother. Give me an hour or two and I'll be good as new."

Callen nodded and headed to Kensi and Deeks' house to see what the hiccup Sam mentioned might be.

Deeks went up to the apartment and laid down, passing out as soon as his head hit the pillow. His body and mind were beyond exhaustion. His last thoughts were of Kensi and how he longed for her by his side.

Sam let Callen in when he arrived. "Where's Kens?"

"She needed to sleep. Only got about 3 hours last night."

"That's good, I got Deeks to crash for a while too."

"These two," Sam shook his head.

"You think we got another mole?"

"Nah, I think this is more personal. Plus there hasn't been anything against the rest of us."

"Yet," Callen interjected.

"It feels too sloppy. Not like last time. Not sophisticated enough to be a mole. Amateur at best. The only thing I'm wondering is how the envelope got on Kensi's desk."

"You think Talia's behind it?"

"Again, the photo shopping looks novice to me. I know she flirts with Deeks, but i don't think she has a death wish."

"Kensi did a number on her before her and Deeks were even official." Both men chuckled at the previous cat fight between the women.

"We're missing something G."

"Let's hope The meerkats come up with something, quick."

"Callen is that you?" Deeks woke upon hearing a rumbling at the door.

"No, it's Talia. Can we talk?"

Deeks opened the door slightly. "Talia? You shouldn't be here. How did you even know I was here?"

"Your trucks out front. You do own this bar. I actually came to talk to Callen, but since you're here..."

"Why would you come to talk to Callen?"

"Jealous Marty?"

"No Talia."

"A girl can hope, are you gonna let me in?"

Deeks ruffles his styled by pillow locks, "not a good idea."

"Come on, Callen texted me. I thought I could help."

"He texted you?" The shock in Deeks voice took Talia back.

"He wanted to know if our case involved any," she thought about the word she wanted to use. "Inappropriate behavior for a married man."

"And you said?"

"I said no, you were a perfect gentleman, as always. Dedicated to the princess and no one else, since the day I met you." She said scooting by Deeks still standing at the entrance to Callen's apartment.

"If you had nothing to do with this, who would want to hurt Kensi and try to break us up by making her think I'm unfaithful."

"I don't know, but whoever they are, they're giving me a bad name as well. I'm not a home wrecker Deeks. I may flirt and go a little overboard, but I know you'd never bite, not while your heart belongs to Kensi."

"I'm glad you see it that way, just wish my wife did."

Kensi woke up when she heard Callen arrive. She needed to know if she was pregnant. She decided to sneak out the back and head to the bar, knowing Deeks would be alone. They could take the test together and find out. Maybe talk a little and figure out what's going on and what they wanted.

She pulled up at the bar and her blood began to boil. She saw Talia's car parked near Deeks' truck. "I'm gonna kill them both!" She headed up stairs. The door was still open and Deeks and Talia hadn't moved far from standing near the doorway discussing who could be behind this.

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME! You bring her to our bar! What the hell is wrong with you. Breaking my heart with these pictures isn't enough. I'm not enough."

"Kensi, you got it all wrong," Talia started.

"Don't you even speak to me," she glared.

"Kens, will you listen?"

"NO! I will not listen to your lying, cheating mouth! Have a great life Deeks!" She threw the bag she was carrying at him and stormed off.

"Great," again running his hands through his hair.

"What's that?" Talia's curiosity was getting to her.

Deeks opened the bag and pulled out the box of pregnancy tests. His eyes stated to tear. He looked up at Talia as she looked at the box.

"Explains why she's a little overwhelmed and emotional. It's not like Kensi not to listen to reason. I'm guessing she doesn't even need to take the test to know the results."

"I gotta go," he pushed past Talia running down the stairs.

"Kens!" He called as she got into the Audi. Pulling away from the curb onto the road, a black truck came out of no where, plowing into The Audi. "KENSI!" He screeched.


	5. Chapter 5

"Kensi!" Deeks cried out. He was too worried about Kensi to get a good look at the plates. The black truck fled the scene. Talia came running outside.

"Call an ambulance," Deeks shouted as he ran towards the Audi.

The truck hit the passengers side pushing her car into the parked cars on the road. Her airbag instantly deployed, as the truck was going fairly fast as it hit her. Kensi was unconscious when Deeks reached the car.

"Come on, baby. You're gonna be ok. Kens, baby please."

"The baby, Deeks, she whispered waking momentarily before losing consciousness again.

"I know, I know." Deeks reassured her looking back to Talia. "How long?"

"Five minutes out."

"Text Callen to put a BOLO out for a black truck with front end damage."

He brushed Kensi's hair back carefully not to jostle her. "You know how much I love you, baby I love you so much," he fought back the tears.

First responders arrived at the scene. They extracted Kensi from the car and loaded her on a stretcher. Callen and Sam showed up minutes later.

"I told Callen to head over when I texted him, Hope That's ok," Talia informed a distraught Deeks.

"Ya, ya of course. Thank you. I'm gonna go with her, meet me there guys?" He said and jumped on the ambulance.

"What the hell happened?" Callen asked.

"Kensi showed up and I was here, she took off. I didn't see anything til after I heard the commotion." Talia explained.

"Let's get over to the hospital." Sam ushered them towards the car.

Deeks was panicked the whole ride to the hospital. The EMTs were asking multiple questions. Deeks muttered through them until the last question.

"Do you know if there is any chance she could be pregnant."

"What?" Deeks looked up.

"Do you know if your wife is pregnant or if there is a chance she could be? We have to let the doctors know, so they can treat her properly."

"We, we were gonna take a test," he muddled out.

"Ok, we will have the doctors check for possible pregnancy." The EMT placed his hand on Deeks' shoulder.

"Thank you," he stuttered.

The medical personnel rushed her back. "We will get you when she's settled. We'll take precautions for pregnancy, while we wait for the blood work to come back."

Deeks nodded with understanding. They weren't at the VA hospital, but another hospital none the less. More and more he hated hospitals. Callen, Sam and Talia arrived a few minutes later.

"We didn't even know she left," Callen started.

"She must have snuck out the back, I'm sorry man, I thought she was sleeping." Sam added.

"She came to take a test with me, but Talia was here looking for Callen when she showed up. She lost it. Thought I asked her to come over. This just keeps getting better."

"I texted her to get some answers, but didn't think she'd stop by. Wait what test?" Callen inquired.

"The hiccup, I mentioned." Sam added.

"You knew?" Deeks asked.

"I had my suspicions. Remember I have two of my own. I thought Michelle was gonna slit my jugular over a box of cookies one day. I went out and got her the tests."

"Tests, hiccup?, What are we talking about. Wait is Kensi pregnant?" Callen still in confusion, wondered aloud.

"She didn't take it yet. She said she didn't want to without Deeks."

"That's why she snuck out and headed over to me."

"But I was there," Talia interjected.

"Where did the truck come from?" Sam asked.

"I don't know, out of no where. It just slammed into her and took off. I didn't catch anything. Some detective, huh?"

"Deeks don't beat yourself up man, you were worried about Kensi."

"She woke up for a minute. She wondered about the baby. Do you think she really could be pregnant?"

"Mr. Deeks," the doctor called.

"That's me," he walked over.

"I'm Doctor Thomas. We have your wife on oxygen and IV fluids. We used a protective covering on her stomach and took an X-ray. Looks like she has some pretty recent well healed ribs, one did fracture again due to the force of the air bag. She has slowly been regaining consciousness, we are pretty certain she has a mild concussion. We don't think it's severe enough to warrant a CT scan yet."

"Her blood test?" Was all Deeks could get out.

"They haven't come back yet, but we did order them STAT. If they come back negative, we will preform the CT for precautions, but until we are certain, it's safer not to."

"Thank you doctor, can I see her."

"Of course. Follow me."

As they were headed back to Kensi's triage room, the nurse came up bringing the blood test results.

"Doctor Thomas, I have Mrs Deeks results."

"Thank you," he took the papers the nurse printed off the computer for him with the results. "Congratulations Mr Deeks. Looks like you're going to be a father."

Deeks stopped in his tracks. "And, the baby, the baby is ok?"

"When Mrs Deeks wakes up we can preform a transvaginal ultrasound to check on everything. Here is her room, we are going to get her moved in a bit to a room upstairs. We will admit her for a few days to make sure her and the baby are good to go. Call the nurse as soon as she is fully alert."

"Got it. Thank you again." He said as the doctor left.

"Hey baby, we have to stop making it a habit meeting this way." He pulled up a chair next to her bed. "The Doctor said you were waking a little. I need you to wake up for me. I have some news." He put his head near her belly. "Hi there princess. I'm not sure why I just called you princess. That would be awkward if you're a boy. But I have this feeling you're a girl. A little princess sunshine. But it's ok if you're a boy too, I just won't call you princess sunshine. Anyway I'm your daddy." Through his ramblings Deeks didn't realize Kensi was coming to and listening to him talk to her stomach. "Wow, I'm your daddy, those words are words I wasn't sure would come out of my mouth, but they are. I need you to be strong in there like your momma, she so strong and brave and I love her so much, even if she doesn't think so right now. I will never hurt either of you, always know that."

By now Kensi was crying and couldn't hide the fact that she was awake. "Baby, your awake. Are you sore? Do you need anything?"

"I'm ok, just in a little pain, is it true? I'm I'm pregnant."

Deeks smiled and shook his head.

"Is the baby ok? The last thing I remember is a black truck driving full speed into me."

Deeks pushed the call button. "Your blood test came back that you are pregnant, Kens. The doctor said he needs to check you and the baby when you woke up."

"I'm scared, Deeks. What if the baby's..."

"Shhh, we're not thinking like that. Positive thoughts. Our baby's gonna be a ninja assassin remember."

"Is everything ok?" The nurse came in asking.

"The Doctor said to let you know when she was awake."

"I'll page him and let him know."

"I'm gonna go let everyone know you're awake. They've been worried," he started to get up. Kensi grabbed his arm.

"Don't go, not yet."

"Ok," his eyes were a little relieved. "I'll wait til after we make sure the baby is ok."

Kensi gave a weak smile. "Are you happy?"

"I'll be happier when we figure out who is behind all this, but yes I'm happy about the Baby. I actually couldn't be happier about that, Kens."

The doctor came in followed by an ultrasound tech who rolled in a big machine with a viewing screen. "Glad to have you back, Mrs. Deeks. We need to perform a transvaginal ultrasound. Because we're guessing you're early in your pregnancy, we can get a better view this way. Do you know when your last menstral cycle was.

"We have a highly stressful job, Doctor and I was recently recovering from some broken ribs. I actually lost track."

"I was aware by your X-ray. One of the ribs is fractured again, but should heal well. The ultrasound will give us a good estimate of how far along you are give or take a week or two. You might feel a little pressure. That's normal."

Kensi grabbed Deeks' hand and held tight.

"There's your baby, everything looks good from what I can see. We are gonna snap some shots so I can review with the radiologist. See the little flick there, that's your baby's heart beat. I'll have the nurse bring in the Doppler so you can hear it. I'm gonna guess you are about 9 weeks. Placing your due date around December 1. Congratulations again. Here's a copy of the pictures. Your babies first photos. I'll send the nurse in to let you hear the heart beat."

The doctor and the tech left the room. Kensi's eyes were full of tears seeing her and Deeks creation of live on the screen. "I'm so sorry, Deeks."

"You have nothing to be sorry for. We're not gonna worry about this right now. We're only gonna worry about you getting better and taking care of our little peanut in there."

"But, I should have believed you." The small tears were now large crocodile ones.

"I'm not gonna say it doesn't hurt and ya you should have had more faith in me, but I'm also not gonna pretend to know what it's like to have your hormones go all wonky. Truth be told, I don't know what I would have thought either. Eric and Nell are gonna prove those photos were falsified."

"They don't have to Deeks, I know you aren't that type of man. That woman just gets to me, always having her hands on you."

"I'm gonna have them prove it anyway. I need them to for me. I need to know there's no doubt in your mind."

"There never should have been a doubt. I was wrong. I don't know what's wrong with me," she put her head in her hands crying more.

Deeks sighed. "You're pregnant that's what's right, not wrong. But, you're right...No there shouldn't have been a doubt after all these years,". He kissed the top of her head gently, "I'm gonna get the guys, they'll wanna know you're awake."

"What about the heartbeat?"

"Hold her off a few, I think the baby's uncles would like to hear it too. If you're ok with that."

"Absolutely." She gave a small grin.

Deeks headed out to the waiting room.

"How is she?" Callen and Sam said in unison.

"She's good. She's great, amazing actually."

"She's pregnant, isn't she?" Sam smiled.

"She is," Deeks smiled largely showing his pearly white veneer.

"Congratulations brother," Sam patted his back.

"Congrats man," Callen added.

"I'm happy for you both. I'm glad she's ok. Callen I'll be in touch." Talia stated as she left.

"The nurse is coming to let us hear our babies heartbeat. We'd like you both to come hear it with us if you like. We figured her uncles should be there too."

"Her?" Sam's eyes raised.

"Just a feeling," Deeks shrugged.

"Well you better hope so, or you'll give your son a complex ," Sam laughed.

Sam and Callen followed Deeks to Kensi's temporary room. The nurse was waiting with a little hand held device.

Callen walked over and squeezed Kensi's hand. "Congratulations, Kens."

She returned with a small smile. Sam kisses her on the top of the head with a knowing smirk.

"Is everyone ready?" The nurse asked.

"Looks that way," Deeks responded.

"I'm going to put a little gel on your stomach. It might be a little cold. Next time you have an ultrasound they will use this as well." The nurse rubbed the end of the attachment around for a few seconds until she came across a steady rapid beat. "There you go."

Kensi didn't think there was any more liquid left in her eyes until that moment.

"Kind Of sounds like a galloping horse," Deeks teased.

"The heartbeat is around 163, sounds good," the nurse informed them. "We should have a room ready for you upstairs in about a half hour. The doctor will come talk to you again, once you're settled."

"Thank you very much," Deeks was appreciative.

"Yes thank you," kensi joined.

"We're gonna get going and see what we can figure out, who is behind all this. Kens, if you remember seeing anyone driving, or remember anything, let us know." Callen told her.

"You two gonna be ok alone?" Sam eyed the couple.

"We have a lot to talk about, but we'll be good." Deeks took Kensi's hand. "For better or worse, right baby?"

Kensi wipes the tears that were still silently falling from all the emotions, finding out she was pregnant and hearing her baby's heartbeat strong and healthy. "Right baby." She agreed placing her hand on her belly as Deeks entwined on top of hers.


	6. Chapter 6

Kensi had fallen asleep shortly after she was settled in her new room. Deeks set up His make shift bed on the hospital couch.

"Nope, don't miss this," he said as he was setting up the blankets.

Kensi began to stir. "My baby! Please not my baby, DEEKS, save our baby!" she began tossing and turning.

"Kens, baby, sshh, You're ok. The baby's ok. Our baby's good."

Kensi began to wake up, more tears consuming her. "Deeks?"

"I'm here baby, I'm here."

"The baby?"

"The baby's ok. Remember we heard her heartbeat."

"Her? Deeks I'm too early to know if it's a boy or a girl."

"I know Kensi, it's a feeling I have. This little one is a princess ninja assassin, like her mommy. I can't explain it, but ever since I found out, I'm certain it's a girl."

"But your dream in Mexico? I was having a boy, I thought?"

"That was just my unconsciousness. My brain injury. I can't believe you remember that." He smirked.

"Of course I do. You were so excited about it."

"That was just a dream. Now it's real, unless I'm still dreaming. Am I dreaming? Are we still in Mexico?"

"You're still an idiot," she paused and looked down. "But, I'm a bigger one."

"You're not. Look at me Kens. You're not."

She put her head back against the pillow, looking away from her husband. He ran his hands over her brown locks. "Just rest baby." She closed her eyes and fell back asleep.

Deeks took a moment to shoot a text to Callen. "Wonder twins find anything yet?"

"Eric outlined the differences between Talia's figure and the pictures. He was able to highlight the face overlay on the body. Nell will bring them over tomorrow. Kensi should be able to see that the pictures were falsified."

"Tell them thank you. Any luck on who delivered the envelope to Kensi's desk?" He replied.

"They haven't pulled the footage of that yet, Eric was insistent that he prove the photos were fake first. He didn't want anyone thinking you were a What was that you said?"

"A scum bag, I appreciate that. When you find something out, shoot me a text. I'll be at the hospital."

"Deeks?" Callen texted.

"Ya?"

"How is she?"

"Better, feeling bad about not trusting me, but she'll be alright."

"You take care of her and my niece or nephew."

"Niece."

"We May have to wager on that later."

"Callen..."

"Yes?"

"Thanks for having my back."

"Night Deeks," Callen responded.

"Night."

Deeks plugged his phone into charge and laid down in his bed for the night. Exhaustion of only a few hours of sleep the past few nights finally won out.

"How is she, G?"

"Deeks said she's better. Nell, I'm sure you want to see her. You can take these to her tomorrow and show her how they were falsified."

"Thanks Callen. I'm anxious to see her."

"I'm sure she'd like that."

"Why don't we call it a night, you can run the footage of the bullpen for the delivery of the photos in the morning. It's been a long few days."

Nell and Eric cleaned up and grabbed the envelope with the pictures. They headed home.

"When can we all just be happy, Eric?"

"I don't Nell. I mean we're happy, right?"

"For now, but what if something comes between us."

"Well, that's why we stay behind the scenes. Except when you go in the field. Anyway, we're all gonna get our happy endings Nell, you'll see."

Nell shrugged. "I guess you're right. I mean Kensi and Deeks are gonna be parents. I can't believe it. But with this hanging over their heads, they can't really enjoy it without being worried."

"It's gonna be ok, Nell." He squeezed her hand lightly.

"Thanks Beale," she winked.

"You wanna come by and have a beer?" Callen offered Sam.

"Hell ya, plus Shaggy owes us," Sam laughed.

"You know things are gonna change now right," Callen pondered.

"They've already been changing, G. We've been running around with no formal leadership for over two years now. We're still getting it done, but definitely changed."

"I'm just gonna miss them both, and that will not be repeated," Callen eyed Sam.

"Me too, never thought that Shaggy haired surfer would grow on me, but he's one hell of a non official agent. And Kensi, well Kensi's Kensi, one of the best around."

"That she is my friend, that she is. What about Nicole? Do a little partner swap. Have her fill in."

"What are you trying to set me up now? Payback for Joelle."

"Well, I think Agent Dechamps has a better reputation that CIA Officer Taylor, now don't you?"

"We back to that again, huh? What about Anna?"

"Five more years on her sentence. There is still something fishy about that. She hasn't answered my letters and Arkady still blames me, so there's that."

"Guess we're stuck with each other then, hey G."

"Guess so Big Guy, unless you decided to join Hamilton on his lone missions," Callen smiled.

"Who'd keep you out of trouble then?"

"Good to know you're looking out for me."

"Always!"

"What do you think their kids gonna be like?" Callen was curious.

"Hopefully, more Kensi than Deeks," Sam chuckled. "I guess his fluffy locks could be a good gene."

"And his baby blues," Callen added.

"Both had Kensi stuck, from the beginning.

"Stuck, smitten, whatever," Callen amused himself and Sam.

"They'll be good parents, G"

"Mmm, I'm thinking it's a good thing we're the uncles."

"Ha, doesn't hurt, that's for sure."

"Deeks is certain it's a girl. Did you know with Aiden and Kam."

"Michelle knew more than me. She was right with both. She said she could just feel it. Man I miss her. A day doesn't go by that I don't think about her."

"I know, I miss her too," Callen sighed. "Maybe Deeks is right, I told him their may be a need for a wager."

"Kensi will kill you if she finds out your wagering money on her baby, but ya count me in."

"Got any theories who's behind the photos and plowing the truck into Kensi's car?"

"I mean we put ourselves in harms way every day, G. We take down people capable of this on a daily basis. But like I said earlier, it seems more personal. Hopefully tomorrow Nell and Eric will find who put the photos on Kensi's desk and we can get a lead."

"I posted security outside Kensi's room to be safe. I know Deeks is there, but I feel better knowing they are protected while their guard is down."

"Good call," Sam concurred.

"Deeks! Deeks!" Kensi screamed.

Deeks shuffled awake. "Kens, baby, what is it."

Kensi woke in a sweat. "I. I. I must have been having a nightmare."

"Baby, I'm so sorry. Want me to lay with you?"

"Please."

"Can you scoot a little?"

"Ow,"

"You ok? Want me to call the nurse?"

"No, she can only give me Tylenol cause this little one," she placed her hand on her belly. "I can take the pain."

"Of course you can. You're badass Blye."

"You have to come up with something that goes with Deeks, I'm a Deeks now remember."

"How can I forget," he said kissing her. "Wanna talk about your nightmare."

"I don't remember much. The truck came out of no where ramming into my car. I don't know. That's all I remember so far."

"Ok, that's ok. You don't remember anything about the driver?"

"Hmm, no it's so foggy."

"Close your eyes," he whispered.

Kensi snuggled into his chest. "I missed you."

"I'm not going anywhere, ever," he whispered back.

Deeks woke up a few hours later. He carefully removed himself from the small hospital bed. He looked at his wife, who was still peacefully sleeping with her hand protectively over their unborn child. He knew he still wanted this woman, but he also knew he was still hurt. He didn't want to stress Kensi out in her state, and he needed to find out who was behind this mess in the first place. They had been through so much in the past decade plus. He knew every couple had their ups and downs, he just hoped they were different. He knew her emotions must have been all over the place, and he definitely didn't want to continue to carry resentment against her, but he needed to make sure she still wanted him and that she wouldn't lack faith in him ever again.

Kensi must have felt his tension as she stirred awake. "What time is it?"

"6am," he replied.

"What's bothering you?"

"Nothing, try to get some more rest."

"I'm not tired. I slept well with you next to me."

"That's good." He huffed a bit, knowing he felt the same, but was still frustrated.

"Are you going to talk to me? I know when something's bothering you. You can fool everyone else, Deeks, but you can't fool me."

"Baby, I'm not sure now is the right time. I don't want to upset you."

"You're upsetting me by not talking to me."

Deeks puffed out a deep breath. "Baby, I need you to promise me not to jump to conclusions anymore. I love you and you know I love you, I don't want you to ever doubt me. It's still bothering me that after all these years you think I could be unfaithful, and with Talia of all people."

Kensi looked down, knowing she was wrong. Tears filled her eyes. "She's just always all over you. I hate it. I don't even know why I hate it. Ugh I can't stop crying. This is so not me. What's wrong with me. Now I sound like you rambling on!"

Deeks couldn't help but laugh at his wife's babbling.

"I don't know if I can do this for 9 months Deeks!"

"Not to be a stickler for details, but You only have about 7 and half left now."

Kensi threw her head back in defeat. "I'm can't tell you how sorry I am. I will tell you over and over."

"I don't need you to tell me you're sorry, Kens. I need you to trust me always."

"You know you're the only one I truly trust, right?"

"I do, and I think that's why it hurts so much that you let that trust falter."

"I've always trusted you with everything, I gave you my heart."

"You did. I will never take that for granted."

"Are we going to be ok, Deeks."

"We will and look we actually learned how to communicate."

"That's a big step for us." She smiled weakly. "I do trust and love you very much."

"I know princess," he said kissing her head. "I know."


	7. Chapter 7

A/N thank you for the reviews favs and likes keep them coming! hope you enjoy

Kensi had fallen back asleep, even though she said she wasn't tired. Deeks went out to get some coffee, decaf, and of course donuts with side of fruit for Kensi. He knew she was unlikely to give up her sweets, he figured he'd throw in something healthy along with it. He felt better after their conversation. They really had come along way. He thought back at how bad they were saying what they truly wanted to say.

"Like I said poor communication skills. I never ever ever know what the hell You're talking about cause you never say what you mean, it's so frustrating, it's like working with a 14 year old."

Then he remembered grabbing her face and kissing her. His lips on hers. Soft and sensuous. Something he'd been wanting to do for months, hell maybe years.

"How's that for communication."

And then she left. With that, it took several more years for them to even come close to where they are today."

"Damn it Deeks you asked me on a date without actually ask me out on a date, and we've talked about this, if this keeps up I don't know how we're ever.."

Then he interrupted her, "I don't wanna be here with you right now,"

"What," she said in shock.

"I wanna be at my place right now, with you."

Then they left, together. He made love to her, the way he had wanted to since they met. He thought maybe their communication skills were improving. Then she was taken away; Making him second guess everything and when she came back he lacked the courage to communicate for fear she'd leave again.

Until, she asked him to be bold with her. Going all In, frightened them both. Their communication skills grew to where they made it to today. Having a baby, getting through some rocky times, he smiled feeling better and relishing in how far they've come. Yet, he still needed to find out who was trying to sabotage them.

Nell and Eric arrived at the mission around 8am.

"I'll get started on the footage while you go see Kensi," Eric said.

"Sounds like a plan. I won't be gone long. New mama to be needs her rest, growing a little ninja assassin." She winked.

Eric quickly got started. He ran through the day, ins and outs. Finally finding the time frame the envelope was placed on Kensi's desk.

"That's odd?" Eric said picking up the phone to call Callen. "Callen, you and Sam close?"

"Pulling In now, what do you got Eric."

"Head up to OPS, when you get in."

The partners huddled upstairs. "What'd you find Eric?" Sam probed.

"Ernie put the envelope on the desk. Why would he do that?" Beale showed the guys. Ernie often stayed on Security at the boat shed. He was loyal NcIs employee, former marine and always there if they needed anything.

"I guess we'll head over to the boat shed to talk to him," Callen informed.

Deeks came back with goodies for Kensi. He heard her crying in her sleep again. He hated that she was having so many nightmares. He put the items down and went to soothe her awake.

"Kens,"

She woke up, tears streaming. "Deeks?"

"Ya baby?"

"A woman was driving the truck," she looked at him with surprise.

"A woman? Did you recognize her?"

"No, I just saw her hair poking out of a hooded jacket. That's all"

"That's a start. We're gonna figure out who's behind it."

"What do I smell?" She perked up.

"Well, we have coffee, decaf for the next seven months, donuts and some fruit to add some kind of healthiness."

"Thoughtful," she smiled taking a bite of her gooey goodness. Then sipping her coffee and almost spitting it out. "I may have to give this up,"

Deeks took a drink and joined her in spitting it out. "Ya we have to figure something out to replace this."

They both laughed as there was a knock on her hospital door. "Hey," a petite red head poked through the door.

"Nell!" Kensi's face lit up.

Hey Velma!"

"Congratulations are in order I hear." She came in bringing a little teddy bear. "I know it's early, but I thought I'd bring the first gift."

"Well, you heard correctly, and thank you."

"I have another gift for you." She looked at Deeks who nodded in approval.

Nell went over the details of the photos that showed they were doctored. Kensi didn't want to look at them but obliged knowing she owed it to Deeks to see the truth.

"Looks like someone was able to get you and Deeks in some compromising situations, but shopped Talia's face over yours. You can see by the shadows and mismatched outline."

"Thank you Nell." Deeks appreciated her help.

"I got you," she smiled.

Kensi felt terrible, "I should have looked closer. I promise I'll make it up to you."

"That's what Nellasaurus and her man are for. You just carry my baby and make sure she's healthy and that's enough."

"There you go with the She again. You better hope this baby is a girl for as much as you say she."

"I guess I'm that confident," he smirked.

"I guess so."

"Anything else on the delivery person."

"I'm heading back now to check. We will be in touch. Congratulations again." Nell Hugged them both and left.

Sam and Callen headed over to the boat shed. Ernie was outside keeping watch.

"Hey guys,"

"What's up E?" Sam shook his hand. "Got a sec."

"Sure what's up?"

"You put an envelope on Kensi's desk the other day."

"Ya, ya. One of Detective Deeks CI came And asked me if I could deliver it. She said it was very important but it needed to go to Mrs. Deeks."

"She?"

"Ya, it was a woman."

"And she said Mrs. Deeks, not Agent Blye or Agent Deeks."

Ernie thought for a minute. "She said this is urgent. Detective Deeks was waiting for it, but he requested I give it to Mrs. Deeks. Did I do something wrong?"

"No Ernie, we just are trying to figure out why she wanted Kensi to have it." Callen soothed the man's nerves.

"Did she give you her name."

"No, she had Detective Deeks card, seemed legit. Just said she was a CI and he told her to bring any info she had for him to the boat shed. I figured we don't let outsiders to the mission, so he had her drop it off here."

"Do you remember what she looked like? Anything specific."

"Man it was dark. Figured she was trying to not be identified. Sorry guys if I caused any trouble."

"Your good man, thank you," Sam assured him.

Callen's phone rang as they were leaving the boat shed. "Deeks, what's up? How's Kens? Everything ok?"

"Ya man, she had another nightmare, but she remembered something."

"About the driver?"

"Ya, she said it was a woman."

"Kensi said it was a woman who was driving the truck," Callen told Sam.

"Same woman?"

"Deeks were gonna have Eric on kaleidoscope to what he can get from the accident. He found out who put the envelope on Kensi's desk. It was Ernie from security."

"What? Why?"

"We just questioned him. We're leaving the boat shed. He said a woman came and brought him the envelope. She said she was one of your CI and that you needed this info but he needed to give it to Mrs Deeks."

"That doesn't make any sense, did he get a look at her."

"No he said it was too dark and she was acting like she didn't want to be identified."

"Well obviously," Deeks replied.

"Any ideas?"

"Honestly, not a clue."

"Maybe Eric can get something off the cams. Even a shot we can send through facial rec."

"I'll head over in a bit. The doctor is probably gonna discharge Kensi This afternoon. I'll get her settled at home and head over to the mission."

"Give her our best, see ya soon buddy."

"Eric, got anything from the woman meeting Ernie or the accident."

"Go these two shots but it's not enough for facial recognition. It's a partial side view. Maybe Deeks can identify her."

"Search Kalidescope for the truck. Try to get a better picture at a stop light or traffic cams."

"On it."

"Alright Mrs. Deeks, are you ready to go home."

"Very!"

"Here is a script for prenatal vitamins, a referral to Dr. Alma, she's a highly regarded ob, you'll need to make your appointment for 2 weeks from now."

"Ok," Kensi nervously replied.

"Rest, Mrs. Deeks, is very important. Take care."

"You heard that, rest. I'm gonna have to use my police officer skills I'm sure."

Kensi couldn't help but laugh.

"Let's get you home."

"Sounds perfect."

When they arrived home after picking up the vitamins and a few things Kensi already began craving, Deeks helped her get comfortable and started playing America's Next Top Model from last year. All the crazy cases and wedding planning, last season sat Unwatched.

"Perfect chance for you to catch up, Sugar bear. I'm heading over to the mission to see if we can find out who is behind all this."

"Be careful, Deeks."

"Always," he leaned down to kiss her and headed off to meet the team.


	8. Chapter 8

"What do we got guys?" Deeks asked as he arrived at the mission and headed upstairs and entered OPS.

"Just two side view pictures. The camera angles weren't good. I haven't gotten any good hits off Kaleidoscope since for facial recognition."

"Show me what you got Beale." Deeks demanded.

"If you can tell who it is from these views, you're an even better detective than I thought you were."

"Well, let's give it a shot. It's all we got so far, we gotta give it a go."

Eric pulled up the only images he had of the woman who was driving the black truck and the woman who gave the photos to Ernie, presumably the same, but since the pictures were unidentifiable, it couldn't be certain.

Deeks stared at the images. "Zoom in, Eric."

"That will just make it blurrier."

"Beale!" Deeks became a little more forceful.

Eric blew up the pictures as much as he could.

Deeks studies them closely. Looking over every detail he could see.

"Damn it," He finally said rushing out of the room.

Sam and Callen looked at each other with concern.

"That can't be good." Callen knew Deeks had an idea of who was behind everything, but he refrained from sharing with the team. That concerned Callen.

Sam went looking for Deeks throughout the mission. He wasn't in the armory, gym or range. He headed back up to OPS. "Eric ping Deeks' phone."

Deeks quickly headed to the burn room after exiting OPS. He grabbed a sealed box and retrieved something from it. He folded it up and headed over to the boat shed. He turned his phone off and removed the battery. He needed time to think with no pressure and no one following him. Ernie was just finishing his shift when Deeks called out to him.

"Hey Ernie, got a minute."

"Hey Deeks, look I'm sorry if I caused any trouble. Everything seemed up and up with that lady. I already told Sam and Callen everything I could."

"You're good. Really I'm not mad, or I'm not angry," Deeks smirked to himself remembering Kensi telling him "dogs get mad, people get angry."

"I know you still have cases with LAPD sometimes, she knew were the boat shed was, so I just figured you told her to bring it here.

"Of course, it's really ok, I'm wondering if you can take a look at this picture for me."

Deeks handed him a photo he had folded in his pocket.

"It was dark Deeks. It could be. I can't tell you for certain."

"That's alright, thank you for looking. Have a good rest of you're evening."

Ernie nodded and headed off feeling bad he couldn't be of more assistance.

"He must have it off guys." Eric told the senior partners. "There's no trace of him."

"Let us know as soon as he turns it on. He'll turn it on eventually to call Kensi, I hope. Nell head over to check on Her. I have an idea of where Deeks will end up."

Kensi was watching America's next top model, but getting bored. She really only liked to binge watch it with Deeks by her side. Otherwise, two episodes a night seemed to be her max. She felt her eyes feeling heavy, which normally wasn't like her as well, unless her adrenal fatigue was setting in. Seeing as how she hadn't had much in the way of action the last few days, she figured her new addition growing in her belly was the culprit.

"So you're gonna drain all my energy, that's how it's gonna be?" She chuckled. "I'm talking to myself, well I guess I'm talking to you little one. Oh gosh, I'm sounding more and more like you're daddy daily," she hummed. "He's rubbing off on me," She heard a knock on the door. "Did daddy forget his keys?" She got up to check. "Oh hey, Nell."

"Hey Kens. Want some company?"

"Sure, got any sweets. Deeks is limiting my sugar intake and I'd love some rocky road."

Nell giggled. "Nope, no rocky road today, I'll put that on my list for my next visit."

"Mmm, I hope I don't get any weird cravings, although, bulgogi with a side of twinkies sounds amazing right now."

Nell scrunched her nose. "Anyway, how are you feeling."

"Sore where I recracked my rib, but otherwise just tired."

"I guess it takes quite a bit of energy to grow a ninja assassin."

Kensi eyed her over questioning her name Deeks has often given their impending children.

"You guys don't always remember to turn coms off, we're always connected to you."

Kensi chuckled but noticed her pixie friend looked nervous.

"Nell, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, why do you ask that," the red headed woman began to fidget.

"Is Deeks ok?"

"Yes, well yes and no," she couldn't lie to her friend.

A look of worry came over Kensi. "He sent you here to check on me?"

"Actually, Sam and Callen did."

"Nell?"

"Please don't worry Kens, it's not good for you or the baby."

"What happened, Nell?"

"We think he might have an idea of who's behind everything."

"That's good, right?"

"He didn't tell us for sure. We showed him the pictures we had of the woman. They were just side views, nothing facial rev could pinpoint. Something familiar must have clicked with him, then he kinda just took off."

"Took off? Where to? Why would he do that? Sam and Callen need to back him up."

"They went to look for him."

"He left the mission."

"Ya, he took off from OPS and turned his phone off, taking out the battery. We can't ping his phone. Sam looked everywhere in the building but he wasn't there."

Kensi exhaled the breath she was holding. "Check the beach." She mouthed as she decided to text Sam.

"The beach, G?"

"His safe haven."

"Kensi just texted that."

The men walked up to their partner and friend. "I really gotta find a new place to come to think."

"That wouldn't be you brother," Sam commented.

"I'm sorry I took off like that."

"Wanna talk about it?" Callen queried.

"What spooked you?" Sam added.

"I think this is one I need to handle on my own," Deeks ruffled his hands through his hair.

"You're not alone, Deeks. How many times do I gotta tell you that," Sam was irritated at Deeks insistence of going about this by himself.

"I hear you, I do, but this is my demon to bare. I have to go back undercover. It's the only way I'm gonna get the honest answers."

"Kensi's not gonna go for that. Not now."

"That's why I need you guys to keep her calm and safe, at least til I can figure out the pieces to this puzzle"

"Deeks?" Callen looked at the man before him. Something was different. He almost looked broken.

"Please Callen. I need you to protect Kensi and the baby."

"And who's gonna protect you?" Sam threw back. "I'm not ok with this."

"I knew you loved me Sam Dog." Deeks smiled with the change the man had shown him over the years. There was a time he thought Sam didn't approve of him, hell Sam basically told him he didn't. Then Deeks risked his life to cover Michelle. He would never forget that. Sam opened his closed mind from that day forward appreciating all of the tactic Deeks employed.

"Man, this is not time for humor, or a rouge mission. You have a baby on the way!" Sam argued back.

"That's exactly why I need to do this. I need to close off old parts of my life. I can't have them following me, punishing me, coming after me or my family. I have to do this...alone."

"What are you talking about? Who are you going undercover as?"

Deeks looked out to the sea, then down at the sand. He scratched the back of his head fluffing his waves of gold. He look up at the men. "Max Gentry"


	9. Chapter 9

"You better talk with Kensi before you do anything stupid," Sam suggested.

"Humph," Deeks lamented. "You know how well that's gonna go over."

"Deeks, you guys have already been treading water over this, now's not the time to be stubborn," Callen reminded.

"And she needs to trust me on this. I know she's pregnant and normally she wouldn't have even batted an eye over those pictures. But, right now," he paused "right now, I can't start an argument with her. Her emotions are all over the place."

"Deeks,"

"Guys, please. Just trust me. Let me do this. Alone, I need to."

"At least tell us where you're going."

"I'll turn my phone on when I get there, if I think there is gonna be trouble."

"I still don't like it."

"You don't have to like it. We've all done things one of us didn't agree with, but we supported it, not liking, but going along, cause were a team. I have to treat this delicately."

Sam and Callen looked at each other. "Deeks, were more than a team," Sam interjected. "We're a family."

"Then take care of mine, ours," Deeks suggested.

"At least let us overwatch you in case something goes wrong. Max has a lot of enemies."

"Ya," he huffed "I know, but no overwatch. I don't want you there unless I need you. I know you guys too well. 12 years, we know how to read each other. Especially, being the super skilled detective I am. Kensi will know how to find me if anything goes wrong. She's got that spidey sense when it comes to her lean mean sex machine."

"Ewe TMI," Callen screeched like a girl.

"You gone too far, now man," Sam was fairly amused.

"I'll be ok, guys. You may not be in the wings per se this time, but you'll be there."

"I still think you need to tell Kensi,"

"I will when the dust settles."

"Your call man, but I'm not saving you from her." Sam warned.

"You count me out of that battle as well," Callen added.

"You both wound me, not as much as Kensi will, but I have to do this for our future. I gotta go back to the mission and get into character. Take care of Kensi and my baby."

"You better be careful, brother," Sam warned.

"Just tell her I said, don't worry, Fern, I'll be back."

The two senior partners headed toward the parking lot.

"You coming?" Callen asked Deeks.

Deeks nodded, "I just need a few more minutes," he breathed out.

The men nodded back and headed off.

"You gotta a tracker on you?" Callen asked.

"Brought it in case."

"Bumper?"

"Keep watch, G" Sam said as he bent down and placed the device on Deeks truck.

"Clear, let's go."

"Who's telling Kensi."

"Not it!" Callen shouted.

Sam's phone buzzed. "Damn, it's her. She really does have spidey sense when it comes to him."

Callen burst out laughing.

"What are you laughing at? I'm driving. She's calling you next G, when I don't answer."

"You wouldn't do that."

"Oh ya, watch me," Sam said placing the phone back in his pocket.

"Come on Sam!" Kensi said texting Callen next. "Did you find him?" Was her words. Impatiently, She waited for a response.

"Do you want some tea, Kens. You need to relax a little." Nell was attempting to take care of her distraught friend.

"I'll relax when I know what's going on with my husband." She said dialing Callen's number.

"Ugh! She's calling me now. Thanks Sam."

"Hey, a guys gotta do what a guys gotta do to protect himself."

"Hey Kens, what's up?" He pulled the phone away from his ear so Sam could hear her ranting.

"Sam's not answering, neither were you. That's why I'm calling. Geez! Answer a text for crying out loud. Where is Deeks? Was he at the beach? Who's behind all this? Are you with him still? I'm going to kill all three of you and then bring you back to life and kill you again. You're making me crazy and I'm worried and the baby is making me tired and all emotional. I'm getting all teary eyed again. I need Deeks. Please just tell me what's going on!"

"Kensi, I can't answer you when you're homicidally angry and rambling on like Deeks on a Monday. Take a breath."

He could hear Kensi sigh deeply trying to catch her tears.

"Damnit why am I crying so much! What the hell!"

"Kensi, for one you're pregnant. That tends to cause hormone imbalance. At least that's what Sam told me," Callen covered his words, blaming his partner. "He was at the beach."

"So he's with you?"

"Not exactly,"

"What do you mean not exactly? Callen. Where the hell is he?"

"That's a great question."

"What do you mean that's a great question, WHAT THE HELL!"

"He's going undercover," Callen hesitantly told her.

"WHAT! What the hell is he thinking."

"Kensi, you need to calm down."

"You're going with him right? You and Sam are gonna back him up?"

"He said he needed to do it alone."

"And you're letting him? Put Sam on the phone."

"He's driving Kens."

"Put him on speaker then! Right now Callen."

Callen put on speakerphone.

"Kensi," Sam said soothingly trying to calm her down.

"You're Following Deeks right?"

"We put a tracker on the car without him knowing. Hopefully he doesn't check for one. He's pretty tore up about doing this." Sam responded.

"I'm gonna year him up! Who is his alias. Who's he going undercover as?"

There was no response from Callen or Sam.

"CALLEN? SAM?!" Kensi yelled.

"Kens,"

"Tell me now, Callen."

Callen paused. "Max Gentry," he finally let out.

Kensi dropped the phone.

"Kens?" Callen could hear the phone hit the ground, then he heard Nell.

"Kensi, Deeks knows what he's doing." Nell soothed a sobbing Kensi.

"Does he, he hates that alias. He hates everything about it. That's why Hetty let him seal it away. It was marked do not use unless dire circumstances. He hasn't used it in years."

"Well, then he must need it now."

"But why? Why isn't he letting Sam and Callen help him or let me help? He's still angry at me for not trusting him in the first place. This is all my fault."

"I don't know why he's not letting them help, Kens. You know this is not your fault. Can I be honest?"

She nodded wiping the tears. "Do I think you should have believed him? Probably, you know Deeks would never cheat. He loves you more than anything. And this baby, this baby definitely is a sign of that. With that, I can't say I know what it's like to be pregnant. I have no idea what you are feeling or going through. Your body is changing to house a little one for the next seven months.

Kensi breathed a little. "I just need him to come home to me and this our baby," she placed her hand protectively on her belly.

Callen had hung up the phone after it dropped. "Stop by Kensi and Deeks' place. She needs us."

Sam turned the hellcat around and headed for Their house.

Deeks walked back into the burn room when he arrived at the mission. He pulled out the box he unsealed earlier. He pulled out his leather jacket from it. His skin crawled. He cringed at the smell. He put it on and ruffled his hair. He shook his head in disgust. He took his wedding ring off and kissed it. "I love you Kens and you little baby."

He put his ring in the box and put in back on the shelf for safe keeping. "I'll be back to get it, I promise." He sighed. He knew this was going to be dangerous. He knew he would probably regret not having Sam and Callen to back him up. He knew he hated that Kensi was in no shape to back him up, although he couldn't be more happy about the reason why. He just hoped he wouldn't run into too many problems, putting a rest to this once and for all. He finished getting into character and headed to Max's old hang out at the bar downtown.

Sam and Callen showed up at Kensi and Deeks' house 15 minutes later. Nell answered the door.

"Hey," Sam walked over and put his hand on Kensi, who was standing staring out the window.

"He shouldn't be alone, Sam."

"That's why we tracked the truck. He's tough, just like you."

"Not when he's Max, I mean he is, he's more than tough, but it gets to him being Max Gentry."

"He'll be alright. He told me to give you a message."

"What's that? Don't kill me when I get back?"

"He said, Don't worry Fern, I'll be back. Whatever the hell that means," Sam smiled. "I delivered the message."

"Of course he did. Why are we sitting here? We need to be at OPS, finding his truck, seeing where he is. I have a bad feeling. I need to know where he went."

"You feeling up for it?"

"Are you really ask me that? Do you think I could stand here pacing for hours and just wait?"

"Dumb question. Let's go."

Deeks pulled up at the bar and blew out a deep breath. He looked in the rear view mirror and felt hatred for the man he saw. He knew this probably wouldn't go well, but he had to protect Kensi and his baby.

"Hey Max, longtime no see," the bartender greeted him.

"Where is she?"

"Who?" He replied playing dumb.

"You know who," he screamed getting into the bartenders face pounding his fists on the bar top.

He nodded toward the back room. "She's been expecting you, Detective."

Deeks' heart sunk. Hetty thought his cover may have been compromised, but didn't fully rid it from use. It was a good alias, but as time went on she saw the effects that being Max Gentry had on the man and put it away for safe keeping. Now it was certainly no longer a viable alias. Deeks needed to finish out the game. He walked in the back room. She turned and looked at him.

"Hi Max, I mean what is it Marty, Detective Marty Deeks, isn't that right?"

"Yes Nicole, it's Marty."


	10. Chapter 10

Nicole Martindale...ex-wife of Marty Deeks' best friend and Criminal informant, Ray Martindale. Ray was now living with Jenna under aliases away from LA. Hetty alway kept Deeks up to speed on his old friend. He and Jenna had a 10 year old boy named Ray Martin, it was a great combo of his old name and friend. Hetty informed Ray that Marty's thing with Wikepedia was going strong and Marty has finally found the family he deserved. Ray begged Hetty to allow him to be at the wedding, but she deemed it unsafe at the time. Nicole was sentenced to five years in a minimum security women's prison due to her involvement in the attempt on Ray's life. She was out on parole after three and a half years. She had been out for nearly six years now. Her first few months in prison she focused on her hatred for Max. How he broke her heart. He played her in her eyes. The man she had fallen in love with, was not real. The man she was less than faithful to her husband for was fake. No truth behind it at all. Worst of all, when she asked him if any of it was real, all he could say was he didn't know. How could he not know. All those times, all those words, he didn't know if it was real? She tried to let it go, she figured she was getting off easy, after all she had a part in her husband's believed death. It could have been far worse off than the prison she was in. She could have been placed in confinement with more violent offenders, so she swallowed her pill and was out on good behavior. Every night those three words, I don't know, ate away at her. When she was released, she picked up her old life as if the years hadn't flown by. Obviously, Ray was gone, Jenna had vanished, and Max, Well Max never existed. So she researched. She wanted to know who the man she fell in love with Really was. She fell hard for Max Gentry despite being married to another, his best friend nonetheless. She now knew he was a cop, he told her that much. He knew he was the one who had turned Ray. She knew where the boat shed was from being taken there to be questioned about her involvement with Ray's attempted murder. She called LAPD a few times only to be told Detective Marty Deeks was on assignment and couldn't be reached. She had tried to give up being angry until one night.

As luck would have it, she dropped her keys that night leaving the bar. She bent down to retrieve them noticing they had fallen on a small card. She picked up that card. Detective Marty Deeks LAPD, she read. Her fingers traced across his name. She knew this was a sign. She wanted him to hurt as she did. Sam and Callen thought it would be quite amusing if they passed all Deeks' business cards out to the entire homeless population in LA, one of these cards fell directly in the hands of Nicole. She pocketed the card figuring it might come in handy one day.

She was a model prisoner and befriended a lonely security guard named Dan. They became fast friends. Nicole has found out He knew Marty from his lawyer days, visiting inmates and helping the ones he could that he was assigned public defender to. Another thing she didn't know, Max Gentry AkA Marty Deeks has been a lawyer. He could have helped her sentence be even lighter and yet he didn't. Dad never thought Marty was a bad guy, and Nicole played along. This gave her information she needed and wanted.

"Did you hear Marty got married last year? I never thought I'd see the day Party Marty let a woman tie him down. He always had a good heart, but didn't think he was a settling down type. He always seemed to be straight forward business only. No time to settle."

This made Nicole's blood boil. Married! He was always a playboy, or least Max was, but said she would be the only one he settled with. All lies for his undercover. More and more she realized she never knew the true man that spent many nights beside her when Ray was out playing the town. After she was released from prison, Dan and Nicole began regularly meeting for coffee. Dan wanted to progress their friendship into more, but Nicole always held back. She explained she had been burned by a guy named Max, never letting on that Max was one Marty Deeks. If she could have just let go of the past, she could have moved on with a nice man and started a new life, but she couldn't. I don't know, just wouldn't get out of her head.

"Interesting? Do you know who he married?" She asked curiously.

"Get this, his partner, what a story," Dan laughed. "Heard it from some of the guys bringing in prisoners. Guess being partners all those years, they fell in love. Regulations out the window huh?" Nicole chuckled along with him even though she was hiding her anger.

Nicole has an idea. She was not about to let Max or Marty have a grand life while she had lost both him and Ray. She hired a local private investigator that often frequented the bar. Luck would have it, he was a patronage, two nights after Nicole found out the news about Deeks and Kensi's nuptials."

"Want a job?"

"That depends on what kind?" The man eyed Nicole.

"A job, job," she gave him a dirty look. "I want you to follow someone and get some pictures."

"Easy enough."

Nicole looked warily at the man, "there's a catch."

"And that is?" The man asked putting down his drink.

"The person I want pictures of is an LAPD detective, so you have to be careful not to get caught."

"I got this. I've taken pictures of thousands of unsuspecting people, from celebrities, to law enforcement, to your run of the mill cheating housewives of Beverly Hills." The man said cockily. "It's my job," he eyed her back.

Nicole explained to him she needed picture in compromising situation. She explained how he fooled her and wanted to get back at him. The private eye was known for being a shady creature and was all in as long as his name stayed out of it. He was all about a quick buck.

And so the adventure to set up Max Gentry...Marty Deeks began. The detective was certainly good, but the team had let down their guard a bit with the lack of supervision. They still had to get things done to protect the country, but became less adamant with protecting their own lives. The daily ins and outs at the office wore on them emotionally as well as mentally.

Kensi and Deeks has become the most relaxed. After marrying, they were ready to just live. As they moved closer and closer to getting out, they fell into a more monotonous routine, even though they knew better. All the close calls and near deaths, life was calling and so they followed. They often frequented the same beach, although they set up at different areas each time, it could almost be predicted if weekend surf was good, they'd be there. Tourists snapped photos all day, so nothing seemed off in their de heightened sense. It was so unlike them, but they just wanted to be A boy and a girl hanging out sometimes, even though they still had a huge take of a world to save.

Nicole got her payday when Talia and Deeks were assigned together. The over flirtatious Talia, unknowingly gave Nicole more ammo than she thought imaginable. It seemed things were falling nicely into place. The private eye was able to help her photo shop several of the images to her liking. She then headed off to the boat shed to deliver her trap. The card she found for Deeks iced the cake for her cover story of being a CI. Working like a charm, the plan was in motion. Adding to the perfectly placed pieces, was a hormonal pregnant Kensi, who would have scanned unconvinced over the photos, had a little growing baby, not been making her thoughts out of the norm.

Nicole was highly satisfied when her shady PI gave her photos of the Deeks' fight. He was quiet a good investigator and was even able to compromise their current house.

"I figured you'd like these as a memento he winked."

Nicole handed over the remainder of his pay day and he was off to find another not so up and up job.

Now here they were. Face to face, over 10 years had passed. The woman hadn't aged much, but sadness and anger was visible in her eyes. He knew he was responsible. He was angry and the hurt she had caused his wife, but knew he was partially to blame. His anger softened a bit.

"Nicole," he softly began.

"No you don't get to speak right now!" He anger filled her.

He tried again, Nicole, please listen to me," when he felt a stinging shock to his neck. Deeks had only been paying attention to her from the moment he walked into the back room and didn't notice the two thugs standing in the dark corner, that Nicole had waiting in the wings. They tased him and zip tied him to a chair when he went down.

His wrists were zipped behind him and his leg to the chair legs. This has been long thought out and well prepared. Nicole wasn't playing. Damn him and his need to end this and confront her. Damn him for letting down his guard. If he didn't die here, he was certain his Kensilina would kill him for scaring her and plying the hated Max Gentry once again.

She grabbed his face as the shock wore off and brought him into a deep kiss, "now," she stared into his deep blue eyes, "was any of it real?"

"Nicole, that was so long ago. I don't have an answer for you."

She cued one of the thugs to punch him. He took several rounds to the gut and a few upper cuts to the jaw.

"Not so tough now Maxie?" She tormented.

"You don't want to do this Nicole. You know that I'm a cop, you know what that means if I don't get out of here."

"Oh but I do, do you think I care, I've been waiting a long time for this moment. I couldn't have dreamed it would go so well," she pulled him into another kiss. Deeks refused to kiss her back. She pulled back and glanced at the other thug who pulled out a knife. "Was ANY of it real?" She emphasized.

"I don't know." He looked up spitting out a bit of blood from the previous uppercut.

The man with the knife cut into his jacket slowly ripping at his skin drawing blood.

Deeks winced in pain.

"I want answers! How could you say those things to me, make me want to be unfaithful to Ray and not mean any of it."

"I had a job to do. I'm sorry you got caught up in it. I was just trying to help you. Help Ray. I don't know what else to say Nicole."

"Tell me how much was real!"

"Truth?" He asked gritting his teeth still feeling pain.

"It would be nice."

"I can honestly tell you I never felt with you like I do with my wife. She makes me feel alive. But I was playing a part. Max wasn't me."

Hurt more by his revelation, She nodded again at the man with the knife, who preceded to shove the knife into his shoulder above the first cut, making Deeks whimper a bit.

"You can stab me all you want Nicole, but it won't make you whole again. Only you can find peace from this. I'm not worth you throwing the rest of your life away."

"You broke me Max Gentry, Marty Deeks! You!"

He shook his head, blonde locks falling in his face, "that's not true, and you know it's not," he felt a little bit guilty, but continued. "You were broken long before I met you."

The man on cue stabbed him again. This time he stabbed him between the shoulder blade, on the side of the last cut, then crept eerily around front and stabbed twice in the stomach. Turning the blade and slowly removing it. Deeks scrunched in pain. He closed his eyes, he pictured Kensi, just as he did all those years ago when Sidrov's men were drilling holes in his mouth. This time, he pictured her holding a beautiful wavy brown haired girl with eyes as blue as the ocean. The other man came around giving him a few more rounds of beatings. He could feel the blood seeping out of his body. "I'm sorry princess," he whispered. He didn't have a chance to turn his phone on, he mistakenly deemed Nicole harmless. He never thought it would come to this. The pain was increasing and his eyes were becoming heavy from the blood leaving his body.


	11. Chapter 11

Kensi, Callen, Nell and Sam reached OPS in record time. There was no time to spare. Kensi would have there heads if they didn't hit every shortcut to get to the Mission. Eric had already pulled the tracker up on Callen's command over coms.

"Where is he Eric?" Kensi crashed into the room. Her face stained with tears and red with fear and anger mixed.

"His car just pulled up to Max's old hangout, the bar you guys found Ray outside of years ago."

"Has he turned his phone back on?" Callen asked.

"Not as of yet."

Sam and Callen glanced at each other, then looked at a distraught Kensi.

"Your call Kens."

"We should head there. It's about 10 mins from here."

"Not so fast, Mrs. Deeks," a petite elderly voice scowled.

"Hetty," the team gasped. They had only had a few minutes of her time at the wedding last year before she went dark again.

"Are you back?" Nell stuttered out.

"Well, it seems my children can't stay out of trouble without me, and I have a grandchild on the way, so I'd say I'm back..." she paused. "For now. But you Mrs. Deeks, are in no shape to head anywhere that could pose a threat to you or your unborn daughter."

"Daughter? Do you and Deeks have some kind of psychic ability," she looked at the older woman, "forget I asked that, but I need to get to Deeks," she turned pale as a wave of fear struck her. "I think he's in trouble."

"Kens, he promised he'd turn his phone on if he felt a threat."

"Callen, I can feel it."

"Spidey Sense," Sam whispered.

"But you need to stay put, Wikipedia, you know Marty would say the same," a familiar male voice sounded.

"Ray?" Kensi's eyes widened.

"Well, I've been Charlie for the past 11 years, Ray's my kid." He beamed.

Kensi sighed, she wasn't sure if the sigh came for a lack of being able to argue two against one, make that six against one, or just overall frustration.

"I'll get him. You took good care of him these last years, now it's my turn again. I wouldn't be where I am today without him. I know how to handle Nicole's crazy rages. Hetty got me here as soon as she could. Said she knew the wolves were back at the door," he looked at the woman who shrugged. "Whatever that means and how she knows everything," he whispered to Kensi.

"Uh hum," Hetty with Nat like hearing heard his last comment.

Ray quickly turned red.

"Please hurry," Kensi frantically responded.

"Coordinates are on your phones, guys," Eric interrupted.

Callen, Sam and Ray headed out to the bar. "Glad you had that tracker, Big Guy."

"Me too, G, me too."

Kensi, Nell, Eric and Hetty remained at the mission. Eric had cameras from the street near the bar. They'd be able to see when the guys arrived.

"How did you know what was going on Hetty?" Kensi asked through falling tears.

"My dear, you know I always know what my agents are up to. Good and bad."

"Where have you been? We've missed you so much,"

"Getting things in order. I have a lot to tend to in my old age. But my place is here with you all now, my children. As much as things have changed, I know you will always want me near by."

Kensi forced a small chuckle. " that's the truth. I should have believed him, Hetty."

"I believe he's told you to stop beating yourself up, my dear. Moving forward, I know you will not doubt your husband again, even if you find yourself in a unfamiliar state," she winked.

"You know you were right about something, well everything, but something you told me once,"

"What's that?" The woman wondered.

"Sometimes you find them, but sometimes they find you. You just have to keep your eyes open. I finally opened them Hetty. Why did I need to close them."

"We all get lost every now and then, what's important is that we readjust our view and find our way again." She paused briefly. "Sit my dear." Kensi obliged the request feeling drained. "I would have never let this "thing" as you call it, continue had I ever feared either one of you would hurt the other. Not after all you've both been through. Not after the mistake I made sending you after Jack. I never meant for you to get hurt. I never meant for Mr. Deeks to get hurt and pull away from you, when things were just getting started.

"Hetty, we know that now and look our thing worked out with your help. Even if the plans went a little awol for a bit."

"Mr Deeks blames himself for that mission, which was never about more than me needing you to protect Jack, but it cost you all, I'm afraid."

Kensi nodded. "But we left those ghosts behind. All of us. You should too" She deeply admired the woman before her. "I can't lose him, we can't lose him."

"We won't. Sam, Callen and especially Ray, will never let that happen."

"Hetty, they just got to the bar," Eric let the information slide off his tongue.

"We're breaching the building, Eric, do you have eyes."

"Only on the outside, Callen."

"We're going in blind then," Sam called out.

"Federal Agents!" They shouted in unison as they busted into the building.

The bartender put his hands up and motioned to the back room.

"You two go, I'll cuff him" Callen directed.

Nicole motioned her two guys Inside to barricade the room. There were shelves and storage containers in the back area. They began moving items in front of the door.

"Federal agents, Nicole. Let us in. Deeks you Alright brother?" Sam called through the door.

No answer came from the wounded man.

"Stay back, or he's dead, your Deeks, Ha," she laughed. "Don't you mean Max Gentry! Now get back! I mean it!" Nicole desperately shouted.

"Nicole, don't do this. Its me you should blame, everything is my fault," Ray stepped towards the door. Callen joined the men.

"Ray?" Nicole asked.

"Ya, it's me. Long time no see huh? Can you let us in and we can talk?"

Silence ensued.

"Eric send me a bus, in case," Sam hushed, hoping Kensi wasn't on coms.

"What? Sam, is he hurt, is he..." Kensi began sobbing. "I'll kill him. I'll kill her!"

"Ten minutes out, Sam," Beale replied.

"Kens," Nell walked over and put her hand in Kensi's. "He has a lot to live for. Please try to remember that. I know it's difficult, but You need to try and stay calm."

Kensi composed herself looking teary eyed at her friend. "What's going on, please." She hated being out of the action, away from backing him up.

"Nicole," Callen began. "Is everyone ok in there?"

"Really? Is everyone ok? No, No they are not ok! I am not ok. They broke me. They both did. I wish Ray was in here bleeding too, next to his so called best friend." Nicole paced back and forth running her hands through her bangs, shaking her head with worry. Looking at the mess she created, she was certain there was no way out.

Sam and Callen looked at each other with concern. They looked back at Ray who was as white as a ghost, worrying for his friend.

"We gotta get in there G."

Kensi could Hear the fear in their voices. She took in a deep breath and sat back down. She was feeling shaky and lightheaded.

"Nicole, he's gotta a kid on the way. Don't take that away from him. Those stories about our child hood, about our dads, That was real, all that was." Ray tried talking her down.

"Well that's great Ray. At least something was real, cause when I ask Max or Marty, he can't tell me if anything was real."

"I know, but he's a good man."

"Really? And what about me? You both played me. You the unfaithful husband, pushing me to the arms of your best friend. You knew he wasn't Max. How could you do that to me?"

"You're right, What I did was wrong. I was selfish. But, we were never good for each other. That's not meant to be an excuse, it's the truth. You said it over and over. I asked him to keep my cover and not let on that he was the one who turned me. He was looking out for me and you. Whether you believe it or not, he was always looking out for both of us. I'm sorry Nicole, but don't throw your whole life away by letting him die."

"It's too late for that." She continued to pace fearing he was already dead as she looked at his lifeless body.

The men outside turned pale. "We gotta get in there NOW!"

"Is there any other way in?" Callen shook the cuffed bartender.

"A window around the side." He replied.

"Keep talking to her, Ray." Callen said.

"Nicole," Ray was running out of things to say. "Please," he pleaded.

"What!" She was becoming frantic as she watched the blood continue to seep out of the man she once loved. Her thugs guarding the door, stacking more things in front to barricade themselves inside.

"Eric, eta on the ambulance?" Callen worried.

"Two minutes."

"You ready big guy?"

They were around the side of the room outside in no time. Sam busted out the window with his gun, hoisted Callen up, who climbed through, not concerned about anything but getting to Deeks. He shoved glass out of the way slightly nicking himself on the broken shards. He quickly shot both thugs upon rolling in the room and handcuffed Nicole in a swift move. He ran to Deeks, checking for a pulse.

Kensi could hear everything. She felt her heart stop, she could feel he was slipping. Her tears fell silently.

"Come on buddy stay with me, Sam can you get in here?" Callen tried to stay calm.

Kensi's sobs became harder. "Please baby, I need you, our baby needs you. You need to see if you're right about it being a girl," she whispered.

"Sam, Callen the ambulance is pulling up." Ray shouted.

"We're hurrying Ray! Direct them this way."

Sam found some crates outside and made his way through the broken window after clearing the remaining pieces away.

"Come on Deeks! Fight man fight, that baby needs her daddy! Look now you got me convinced it's a girl!"

"I can't find a pulse," Callen panicked knowing his makeshift little sister couldn't survive without her other half.

"Move," Sam shouted. He wasn't gonna believe this man would leave Kensi. He felt again. "I got one, but it's weak. G, Give me those towels and start moving that stuff."

"On it," Callen threw Sam some towels from one of the crates. Sam began applying pressure to the wounds in Deeks' stomach. Callen hauled the boxes and shelving away from the door faster than he thought he could ever move. The EMTs came barreling in.

"Five knife wounds to his torso, one arm, one shoulder, one back." Sam filled them in after examining Deeks the best he could, while attempting to control the blood loss.

"We got it from here. Call it in we're 15 mins out for the ER." They quickly tended to Deeks in attempt to stabilize him.

"He's lost about a liter of blood, multiple contusions, we need to get him in stat." One of the EMTs guided the others.

They loaded him in. "He's coding!"

"Clear," three shocks bringing him back. "Pulse is steady, let's roll!"

The men watched as their friend and brother fought to live.

"I need to get to that hospital now." Kensi jumped up. She was losing all sense around her as her heart dropped.

"You're in no shape to drive Mrs Deeks,"

"Hetty, please,"

"Nell, Get Mrs Deeks to the hospital ASAP. We'll be there shortly."

"Yes ma'am."

Ray walked over to Nicole, "What have you done," he shook his head looking at the distraught blonde.

"Me? This is both of your faults." She began to let tears fall.

"Ya," Ray walked away distraught.

"Hey man, you helped save him. Any later and he'd be dead right now."

"From what I saw, he's half way there."

"If you really know him, then you know he won't give up without a hell of a fight," Sam patted the man's back.

"I hope so, he deserves to be happy."

"He does."


	12. Chapter 12

"Martin Deek?" Kensi ran up to the admitting desk inquiring about her husband.

The nurse looked at her, "your name?" She asked kindly.

"Kensi Deeks, his wife."

"And I am Henrietta Lange, his next of kin," the elderly woman arrived shortly after and stood next to Kensi, grabbing her hand gently.

Kensi let out a slow breath full of fear and despair.

The nurse confirmed before speaking, "he's being prepped for surgery. Someone will be out to speak with you when there is news. I'm sorry that's all the information I have for you right now."

"Can you tell me the extent of his injuries?" Kensi's began as her heart was breaking.

The nurse examined the notes, beginning to speak, she was interrupted by Sam, Callen and Ray.

"Kens," Callen called. He looked the at the nurse. "Thank you, I've got it from here," he flashed a smile.

Kensi lost her composure upon seeing Sam's blood soaked clothing. She instantaneously knew it wasn't Sam's blood, it was Deeks'.

Sam and Callen had LAPD take the bartender and Nicole into custody. Then they shuffled Ray in the challenger and headed to the hospital.

Ray walked over to Kensi and helped escort her to a seat. "Hey Wikipedia."

Kensi forced a weak smile. "Did you see him? How bad is it, I need to know!"

Ray turned away. Even though he only had a short time to get to know Kensi, he could see the way his friend felt about her. All those years ago, he knew there was some thing between them. He could also gauge the deep love the beautiful brunette held for his friend. When he asked her to take care of him, he meant it, knowing she would, and he could see now that she kept her word.

Kensi felt uneasy. She could see in his face it was bad. The amount of blood on Sam, the fear in the men's eyes, the looks they gave her, she couldn't stand the feeling. She ran quickly out of the building and found a small bushed area where she emptied her stomach. She felt nauseated. Between being pregnant and the worry for her husband, she couldn't contain herself. Callen nervously went out to find her.

"Hey," she looked up. She heard him coming as she sat on the curb.

"You ok?"

"Nope, not at all. What are we gonna do without him Callen." She placed her hands protectively on her baby growing inside of her.

"First off, we're not gonna think like that. Second, We're gonna have faith in the knowledge that he's a fighter and he's not going anywhere with out seeing this baby born." Callen gently placed his hand on Kensi's still placed on her stomach. Third, he would never leave you willingly. Hell Kens, if he dies before you, his spirit would haunt us for the rest of your life," Callen have her a small grin.

"You're probably right. He'd find a way to let us know he was there. Knocking things over, anyway to make a noise. He never does shut up, does he?" She put her face in her hands not able to hold back tears. "I'd give anything to hear him not shut up now."

Callen pulled her in a tight embrace. "When was the last time you ate?"

"I don't even know. I'm gonna be really great at this mother thing," she said sarcastically.

"You're damn right you are," Sam came out in scrubs cleaned up from Deeks' blood. "Anyone who says otherwise is gonna deal with me."

The tears were still free falling down her face. Both men cradled her in their arms and attempted to reassure her everything would be ok.

"How bad was it Sam, be honest. I saw you."

"I won't lie to you Kensi, it's not good." She began to collapse at the knees. "He's strong Kensi. He's taken a lot." He pulled her up, "Look at me," Sam cupped her face, looking in her teary brown eyes, "you've gotten him through a lot. You dragged his half dead self through the scorching desert, for crying out loud."

She tried to smirk, but instead she whispered out, "How do I get him through this?" She shook her head not knowing how on Earth she could help him survive.

"You and this little one, he's got all he needs to fight to live right here."

Kensi nodded and hugged Sam tight.

"Why don't we get you something to eat," Callen chimed in.

"Green Jello,"

The men looked at her oddly.

"What? It's Deeks' favorite, must be little Deeks' too," she shrugged.

"Ok," Callen said.

"Ok," Sam added.

"Ok," Kensi shook her head as they headed to the cafeteria.

Kensi kept staring at the clock as she ate her third cup of jello. The men chuckled as Ray entered to join them. The four sat at the table. Kensi finished her jello and put the spoon and cup down.

"What is he facing? You never told me. Please."

Callen, Sam and Ray looked at each other with serious eyes. It had been almost three hours since Deeks went to surgery.

Sam let out a deep puff of air. He took Kensi's long slender hands into his. "Three deep wounds to his abdomen. They were the worst, could have hit some vitals." Sam was always straight forward. He saw no reason to play games. He saw the tears forming as she let out a gasp. "One cut his upper arm, one between his shoulder blade. He took a few good punches," Sam continued on.

"Was he alert when you got to him?"

Again, the men's eyes met. Callen began, "I couldn't find a pulse," the tears free falling from Kensi's eyes again. "Then Sam did."

"It was weak, but it was there. He was bleeding a lot." Sam put in the conversation.

"I'm tired," she lamented, not sure she could take hearing anymore. Her eyes became heavy.

"Why don't I go see if I can find you someplace to rest," Ray tried to be helpful.

"Why haven't we heard anything yet?" Kensi sobbed.

"You know they are working on him. We don't know what organs they may have hit. They'll let us know when there's something," Sam told her.

Kensi was trying hard to stay strong, but she was falling apart at the seams. "How did you move forward, Sam?" She watched her friend's wife be taken too soon. Taken right Before her eyes, as her and Deeks arrived minutes too late. Sam was the strongest man she knew, next to her dad. She watched tears flow from his eyes the night Michelle died. The sobs he emitted stayed with her for months, she had never heard such a frightful sound. A sound of a broken man, who was filled with anger and sadness, whose whole life was ripped from him in one moment.

He looked deep in Kensi's eyes. "I miss her every damn day. Damn, Kensi, I can't let you feel that way. I wasn't letting him die. He's not gonna die. Not on my watch."

"I'm being realistic Sam. If he does, how do I get through. How do I raise his daughter," she paused. "It's gotta be a girl right," she forced a lopsided grin. "How do I look at her every day and not miss him."

"Don't lose hope on him now. But If, and that's a big if Kensi, you live everyday thankful for her and you watch Deeks live through her, her eyes, her smile, you keep going for her. Knowing that's what Deeks would want you to do. But that's not gonna happen, you hear me." With that Sam got up and excuses himself. It was almost too much for the normally tough exterior man to take. He almost lost it in front of Kensi. He couldn't have her seen him break, not now.

"We will all be here right by you, Kens," Callen added. "You're not alone and neither is Deeks."

"Do you wanna go to the chapel with me." He big brown eyes looked at Callen. "It's getting too noisy here. I need to think."

"Come on," he took her hand and squeezed. They walked out of the cafeteria down to the chapel. Kensi took a seat in the pue. Callen sat beside her. They sat in pure silence. Kensi closed her eyes.

"Mommy, mommy, look at me, look at me!" a slender girl with long brown curls called out from the ocean. Her bright blue eyes looked up and sparkled next to the ocean water. Her pink wetsuit and pink board contrasted the blue water. She was standing on her board surfing a small wave. Kensi had learned to love pink, her daughter's favorite color. The Shaggy blonde haired man held on to the board, helping the girl with matching eyes stay on her board. Kensi felt her self smile as she watched the pair wave at her. Suddenly a wave overtook the man and child. Kensi began screaming as darkness over came her.

"Kens, Kensi," Callen shook her awake.

"Callen?" She question as she groggily opened her eyes, then frantically began asking, "Deeks, my baby. Where are they? The water overtook them." She was still not fully awake.

"Kens, you dosed off, you must have been having a nightmare."

"What?" She still wasn't all together coherent.

"We're in the chapel in the hospital. Remember?"

Kensi woke fully. She sighed. "Yes, I'm sorry. I'm exhausted."

"Wanna Close you're eyes again."

"No, do you think we can go see if there's any news. It's been four hours."

"Sure." They walked back to the rest of the team.

"Nothing yet, Kens," Nell Hugged her friend.

"I got you a pillow and blanket if you want to rest," Ray mentioned.

"Thank you, all of you. For being here with me, with him."

The doors opened as a doctor exited them, "Mrs. Deeks? Henrietta Lange?"

Both women looked up and looked at each other. "Yes?" Kensi spoke in fear waiting to hear the fate of the love of her life, Her soulmate.


	13. Chapter 13

"I feel like I'm floating. I see bright white lights, not above me, but below me. I don't think I'm dead, not yet anyway, wait am I dead? I'm not sure where I am. Maybe somewhere between life and death. I see my body, lying lifeless on a cold sterile table. I see nurses and doctors in scrubs and masks, frantically working to save lives as they do. To save my life. To save my life, at this very instant, one slip and I may never wake again. I hear faint sounds and mumbles. I can't hear much else, but a long constant beeping. A flat line. Im not ready to die, I think it's my heart monitor I'm hearing. I think they are fighting to keep me alive. I feel a push and pull. I mean, would they continue working on a hopeless dead body? I doubt it, Unless it's some creepy horror film Kensi's making me watch. She loves scary movies, but never alone. She told me that once. I'm still convinced that was a ploy for her to cuddle up next to me. When I woke up after finally falling asleep, I had not being able to sleep for weeks after Siderov tortured me, I was in a very dark place, then my Sunshine showed up, barring gifts of beer and drunken pigs, anyway, as I ramble on in my in between status of living or dying, I remember waking upon my couch, she was snuggling close to me. Her hair sprawled across my very masculine cat pillow. I could smell her familiar scent that I had grown to love. It calmed me like the ocean. Her face nuzzled in my chest. I pretended to be asleep when she stirred, I didn't want her freaking out about our thing as she frequently did. We were still attempting to define said thing. She quietly put on her boots and sweetly covered me with an Afghan. It was simply the most amazing gesture. No one has ever deeply cared about me enough, except maybe Nicole. Nicole made me soup and brought it to me when I was sick. Yet, Nicole is the reason I'm lying here, well the reason my body is lying beneath me and I'm looking down from above, not sure what I'm doing. The parts I hate about undercover, is the collateral damage. Nicole was definitely that. Until Ray needed to be killed, I was able to just disappear, show up when Max was needed, disappear again. She had to go and sell out that Ray was alive, for what was it $100,000. I had to tell her the truth at that point. I did break her, I broke her heart, but she was responsible for the other bad choices. I've learned I cannot always blame myself. Kensi taught me that. Kensi has taught me so much. I never thought I could learn so much from one feisty brunette. She won't admit it, but she has learned a lot from me as well. I taught her it was ok to love again, even if love came in the form of a shaggy haired surfer, who never shuts up. Look at us now! She's having my baby. My baby..."

A long steady beep was ringing in Deeks' ears. His thoughts became fuzzy and he was losing sight of everything around him. He could vaguely hear the doctors and nurses scrambling. They seemed to be getting further and further away. "Clear!" Was the last thing he heard.

"Daddy! Don't let go!" His bright blue eyed girl called as she stood tall on her pink surfboard. Her pink wetsuit was just like the one He told Kensi he could see their daughter in and why he hoped for a girl. It melted his heart. He hair long and curly, brown, but not as chocolatey as Kensi's. She was perfect in every way.

"I'll never let go baby! You're so brave, just like mama. I need you to take care of her for me."

"Where are you going, Daddy?"

"I don't know baby girl," Deeks felt faint. His chest burned, but he couldn't really feel any pain. A bright white Ora passed in front of him, then darkness.

"Daddy, don't go please!" The little voice squealed.

Visions of Kensi came next. Jeans, black tank, hair down wavy. A perfect beauty. Something captivated him about her. He was intrigued with this mysterious woman.

"Really, Deeks? That's the best they could do?" She paused and saw him enter, "oh Hello, Deeks."

"Yeah, That's the best they could do," he leaned down and whispered to her.

"I'm gonna call you Fern!"

"Don't you dare call me Fern."

"Fern, baby girl!" Later laying on her car, coffee cup on his head, "don't worry Fern, I'll be back!"

Six months later after almost being killed, "told ya I'd be back."

"Shut up, Deeks."

"Can I see your gun?"

"My gun? Why? What for?"

"Why are you being weird? You don't trust me, I say that's a big deal, don't you? At this point in our relationship..."

"I'm sorry...did you say relationship?"

"No, I said partnership." Even then the lines were so blurred, even then in the very beginning.

"She slowly began to trust me, she let me in. Why I can't figure out, but I'm sure as Hell glad she did." thoughts running through him as memories poured over him.

"Don't worry you'll get me back..."

"My name is Deeks? Are you my nurse? Don't worry Fern, I remember you."

"I'm glad our thing is working out."

"There is no thing, no thing."

"I'm not angry, in fact I could slit you're jugular vein 11 different ways from where I'm sitting without losing my temper."

"I was protecting our thing."

"So there is a thing?"

"Can we not talk about this right now...I just...maybe we can do it over drinks or something."

"No, I have plans...every night for the rest of my life."

He felt himself chuckle, "you sure do Fern, little did you know those plans would include every night with me." He was replaying every important moment leading up to their current life. Married, a baby on the way, how could he die now? They've come so far and been through so much. It couldn't end this way. He couldn't let it end this way.

"You're the only one I trust."

"Do you wanna talk about that kiss?"

"What, the cover kiss?"

"Ya right, cover my ass" he thought remembering. "Good excuse for you to place your lips on mine. There was no way in hell that was just a cover kiss. If we'd only had more tome playing house as Justin and Melissa." He sighed.

"Promise me you'll never do that?"

"What's that?"

"Get yourself killed."

Her eyes were so sad, so serious. Of course he needed to joke.

"Lucky for you I have a natural aversion to death. But if I do die in the line of duty, do something for me."

"Ya"

"Cryogenically freeze me and put me in your living room." He wondered if she would do that now. He smiled at the thought of a Deeks aquarium. At least then his baby girl could get to know him, well get to see him dead and frozen. Ok, maybe that was a bad idea and a bit creepy, now that he thought about it. And no way could he come back and marry her daughter, which was his daughter. "Deeks!" Pull yourself together he thought through his rambling mind.

"You smell like sunshine, and gunpowder, two of my favorite things." Dumb partner survey. Kensi was obviously constantly thinking about them together. Why did they waste so much time. Time that might forever be frozen now. His head was spinning as the show went on.

"This is not what it looks like?"

"Looks like a man holding a box?"

"What's in the box?"

"Open it."

"Life doesn't get any better than this moment, right now, if everything I've ever wanted is in this box, there no real reason to open it then."

"That damn box. I hope Beale and Nell found that box, because if I'm not dead and they don't find it, Kensi may kill me,"he chuckled to himself as images continued to fly in front of him. Suddenly, He feels a ghost of his lips on hers, he kissed her. Not undercover, he finally really kissed her. An image implanted in his brain, now on a screen in his eyes like a movie in fast forward.

"How's that for communication?"

"If you wanna talk or not talk, I'm here."

"I just wanna get away from everything,"

"And everyone?" "I didn't answer her. I just wanted the pain to stop. "Ok." Damn it. I made her eyes go dark again. Sadness was something I hated to see in those beautiful mysteriously brown eyes.

"Kens, you were the place I went to, to stop the pain, your smile, your laugh, everything, for what it's worth."

"What happens next?"

"It's a love story."

And a love story it was. He was watching theses moments. He felt peace, he felt love, more love then he'd ever known. He loved this woman with everything he had. Then, He felt darkness surrounding him, closing in around him as he tried to fight it, as his chest continued to burn.

The next scene played, that night it happened. All the games, all the wanting. All the passion and frustration, the tension, they succumbed to it all.

"This is not exactly something like tacos,"

"I don't wanna be here with you right now,"

"What?" The shock and confusion in her eyes led him to his next statement.

"I wanna be at my place right now, with you."

And she walked out again, this time urging him with her eyes to follow.

The ride was quiet, but in his apartment, the explosion between them was so intense even as Kensi was so hesitant.

"I don't wanna choose,"

"So we don't, we don't choose."

"You know that's not how this works," she kissed him deeply. "What are you doing to me Deeks?"

"Falling in love with you." He continued kissing her. As the memories passed, he could feel the heat between their bodies. He was honestly falling and falling hard. He could feeling his body floating, then falling as he remembered every single thing. Struggling against himself. He didn't want to float. He wanted to stay grounded, next to her. He couldn't get back, he just remained, with visions continuing to stream in slow motion.

He could imagine himself making love to her for the first time. He had never experienced the feelings he was having with anyone else. He thought she felt the same way. Nervously, the next morning he left telling her they'd meet at the office to alleviate suspicions. He was scared, she was scared. The emotions were overwhelming for both of them. They needed to go to work by themselves. So he got up early and went. Only to have one hell of a day, that ended even crappier, situated in the middle of a frozen lake.

He relived that day as his body was continuing the fight between floating and falling.

"Can we pretend for a minute that I'm not Deeks and you're not Kensi. No ones trying to save the world, We're just a boy and a girl, hanging out."

"My name is Fern, hi."

"You're Fern?"

"My partner doesn't go unarmed."

"I never had a girl give me a knife, does that mean we're official."

"Sometimes a knife is just a knife."

"Ya, but, You don't really like talking about it,"

"I promise I'll be better about talking about this."

"This thing,"

"Yes, our thing"

"She finally admitted it! Progress I'd say. I finally broke through her walls with my witty charm. Really with the love, I unknowingly gave her."

"You have to promise me something, though"

"Anything."

"Be patient with me."

"And I was, because she was reassigned fat away from me. I patiently waited for her return." He thought through the memories playing out in his mind. Even when Talia clearly wanted him, he resisted and he stayed patient.

Until, he was the one holding back. He shuttered while he free fell, he was no longer floating, now just falling through the past. He remembered torturing the cleric for her. Seeing her throat cut, he imagined she was probably feeling the same way right now, the way he did that day. There was no way she was whole, waiting to hear his fate. The same way he wasn't whole that day, waiting to know if the pictures were real or fake. Then, by the grace of God, he figured out the importance of the cleric. He found her, beaten and bruised and took her home, and the he pulled away.

"What does your third heart tell you?"

"She asked me that and I did the stupidest thing, I gave her knife back." Looking back at these memories, he wondered what he was thinking.

"Ok,"

"Contrary to popular belief, I do believe raccoons mate for life."

"I can't believe I said that, how lame was I" he thought as his mind continued to blaze through his moments with Kensi. "Why did I never open that box, she even cut it open for me? If I get out of this fog, I really need to do that, provided my meerkats located it."

"C'mon, partners don't keep secrets."

"Partners..."

"That's what we are, right?"

"And just like that the moment is way gone."

"That's ok, I've got more moments."

"I wanna be bold, Deeks, but I wanna be bold with you."

"No more games?"

"No more games."

"Chips on the table?"

"All in."

"All in..."

"Today,"

"Tomorrow,"

"And the day af...". " I no longer wanted to hear her voice. I had to kiss that mouth, her luscious lips. Watching her talk, it was too much and been too long coming." He kept thinking...so much had they truly been through. Building them to who they are now from who they were then. He was trying to fight the black clouds enclosing him until he started seeing little glimmer of bright lights.

"Hey, you and me were good, nothing's gonna tear us apart...say it, say we're good." he was not going to let death come this soon. He began to fight harder. Pushing the thickness away. Fighting to get through the smog choking him. Sporadic beeping in his ear began to ring.

"Just go home, Deeks,"

"I'm already there."

But dying, dying wasn't home yet. Home was with her. Dying, he wouldn't see her smile, he wouldn't hear her laugh, even the laugh that freaked him out on occasion, he wouldn't touch her skin, kiss her lips. He wouldn't meet his baby. He'd leave her in the world alone, like he promised he wouldn't. He was not going to break his promise. He was a man of his word, after all. He wouldn't leave her, not now, not willingly, not if he could help it.

"Kids are also the beginning of some pretty amazing things." He knew down the line he'd like to start those amazing things with her. Little mutant ninja assassins as he lovingly called them.

"Well, is it too crazy for two people to get married."

"No, is don't think it's too crazy for that."

"That's a yes, baby that's still a yes right?" Ahhh the first proposal. Unofficial, yes but still one of three.

The crash, the coma, the mole, the CIA, the bad times, that somehow still were brighten by good ones.

"Kensi Marie Blye, will you please wake up and Marry Me."

"You're never alone, Deeks." He knew She was right with that statement. He had earned a family in their team. They were never far and always had his back. However, She was the main anchor when any wave hit.

"Life is really short, Deeks. We saw that today, we see it everyday. I don't know how much time either one of us has left, but I wanna spend the rest of what I have with you... so what's it gonna be."

"Yes, What the hell, yes,... let me look at this, well I gotta be honest, I was expecting more bling."

"No, you know me, I'm more bang than bling."

"That's right, sunshine and gunpowder."

"I love you to the end of time and back."

"I can't go through what Sam went through. And I hate feeling like this, because, you're my world."

"You are mine, you're my world."

"I don't think we should be getting married."

"What you are saying to me, is that if I don't leave my job, then you are leaving me."

"I'm still your partner, at least one last time." A time he wish he didn't remember, but it was part of their story. Their love story. He heard the steady stream again. He shook his head and felt his chest go heavy. He felt a shock burn through him, then a beat, then another. He struggled to get back to his body, but he still found himself above it all.

"Listen I need to be with you. I was wrong, I wanna marry you and if you marry me, I swear to God I will give you everything I have in this life."

"I love you so much,"

"I don't want to do this without you." His chest hurt. His heart hurt at remembering this moment. He almost foolishly let her go. He almost died with her thinking he didn't want her anymore. Even in the uncertainty, she never left him, sacrificing herself to drag him to safety and willed him to live. He felt that will again. "I'm not gonna let you do this without me, Kensi." He kept grasping for his body below.

"And I will give you everything I have in this life."

"I love you."

"That's all that matters."

His visions turned white. A white dress sparkling against the ocean back drop. He saw Kensi walking down the aisle. Walking towards him. She took his breath away. He felt a beat in his chest again. It started pounding. He could hear his heart begin to beat. He heard the intermittent beeping become more consistent. He began to feel closer to his body. He could almost touch it. He kept envisioning his wife in her flowing gown. He felt the happiness of that day. "That day made me believe in fairy tales again," he thought. "Some days it was hard to think they existed, but not on that day." The day they married was truly a fairytale. "Our story has been a fairytale." He could feel a smile creep on him.

And then the pictures, the fight, that led to the words from her mouth. "I'm pregnant." The best words he ever heard. Even though things were rough and she worried he was being unfaithful with Talia, those words "I'm pregnant" told him fairytales do exist.

He felt him self falling, falling, falling, until the bright lights were gone and it was dark again.


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N wish i owed anything and everything Deeks and Kensi, but sadly I do not. I greatly appreciate all the review follows and favs, especially on the last chapter I think it was my favorite chapter Ive written. carrying on hope you enjoy!**

The steady beating of a heart finally filled the OR. After six long hours, the doctor emerged from the treacherous task of saving a life. A life filled with memories, a life filled with love, a live with so much left to live for. A life that of lost, would have devastated the hearts of those closest to him.

The doctor was used to seeing families distraught while waiting, but something in the tall woman's eyes before him took him by surprise. Her eyes were deep with fear. Prepared for the worst, but a glimmer of hope held tight in them. He admired the strength he saw. She looked exhausted, but was still alert to discuss the future of her husband. Many things swirled through her mind as she stared at the man standing in front of her. The man who would either end life as she knew it, or give her more reason for her own existence to continue on. The elderly lady, standing next to her, held the woman's hand tight.

"Henrietta, it's good to see you. It's been a while."

"Dr. Golden, prefer it was under other circumstances. Thank you for coming, when I called. I needed the best, and that would be you."

The man's hair was peppered, he seemed to be in his early 50s. Seasoned and professional he replied , "Anytime, I can be of assistance, I will most definitely be. Please, come this way so we can speak in private."

Kensi held her breath. She was nervous about the words her ears were about to hear. She had determined no matter the outcome, she had to remain strong, even if she would be broken inside. She had a piece of Deeks growing inside her, and she owed it to her husband to protect and nourish their growing love.

Hetty always had connections on standby. Especially, when it came to her team and any medical necessities. She needed people she trusted to come at a moments notice, in their line of work it was imperative. Dr. Golden was one of the best surgeons in LA, Hetty knew it couldn't hurt to have him at the hospital in case, when they brought Deeks in. She phoned him before Sam and Callen breached the bar. The doctor obliged and was waiting for Deeks' arrival.

Kensi continued to hold strong, as they walked down the hospital corridor. He took them to a small office.

"Please, have a seat."

Kensi didn't like the feeling of the conversation. It felt heavy and full of dispair. She remained quiet and sat in the chair across from the doctor.

"Mrs. Deeks," he began.

"Please, call me Kensi," she finally quietly spoke.

"Very well Kensi. Let me start by saying your husband definitely has a strong will to live."

The stone cold face broke. She let out the breath she was holding in sigh of relief. "So he's alive?" She questioned, hoping she'd know if her husband had left this Earth. She wasn't sure if the feeling she had was being filled by the growing ninja in her belly. She placed her hands on her stomach and continued listening.

"He came in with a grade 4 laceration to the liver and damage to the spleen from the stab wounds. The wound to his arm and back were more superficial, but the abdomen injuries were quiet sever. The knife Striking the liver caused significant bleeding and the majority of his blood loss. We lost him several times, but each time we were able to bring him back."

Kensi couldn't hold back any longer. She gasped loudly with a slight sob. The doctor placed his hands on hers. "Like I said a strong will to live. He came back to us. Henrietta also threatened my life, if I let him die on that table."

Kensi attempted to pull her self together. "How many times did you lose him?"

"Four, but no longer than a minute each time. We don't believe his brain should have any long term effects, we obviously won't know for certain until he wakes up. We removed his spleen due to the damage it sustained. We managed to controll the liver bleed and repaired the laceration. He did need to receive a pint and a half of blood. We will need to keep him in a sterile environment due to the splenectomy, as he could be more susceptible to infections. We will keep him in ICU for a few days. Visitation will have to be limited for the next week at least. We are going to keep him sedated for a bit, but will begin to wean him off over the next few hours. He probably won't begin to wake until the morning. His full recovery will take some time, He needs to be careful not to re injure the lacerated area. Henrietta, he will need to be on leave at least 3-4 months."

"I will be giving him 9 months minimum, full pay, with his lovely wife here, for him to heal and return to his normal self. Also, in order to welcome their new baby into the world. It's a girl by the way." She winked. "And I will have no arguments from you, Mrs Deeks."

"You always have a way of knowing things, Henrietta." Dr. Golden stated with a smile.

Kensi attempted to smile. "No arguments here," She actually liked the sound of them being together for the next several months, having time to adapt to their impending parenthood, and figure out what comes next career wise. She hoped with everything they needed to figure out along with his recovery, she wouldn't become too bored.

"Why don't you go home, clean up, and get a little rest. I will remain here until you return."

"I..."Kensi began.

"It's an order, not a request. Eat, you need your strength."

Kensi was too tired to argue, but had other thoughts. She only nodded.

Hetty and Kensi relayed the news to the team.

"I knew it would take a lot more for him to leave you and this little one." Sam hugged Kensi tightly.

"We're gonna be there beside you, every step of the way Kens," Callen informed the woman who he considered a sister.

Kensi forced a weak smile. "Thank you."

"Mrs Deeks is going to go home and eat, clean up and rest a bit. I gave her an order she is to follow. Miss Jones, you will drive her home. The rest of you, go, Mr Deeks knows in his heart you are with him. He will have limited visitation, so there is no need for you all to remain her. I'll be here. Keep your phone near as usual and I will contact you when you can visit. Kensi, I don't expect to see you back before morning."

"Yes ma'am."

"If he begins to wake, I'll call you. I'll make sure you are the first thing he sees when he awakes."

Kensi nodded and hugged her mentor.

As instructed Nell drove Kensi to her house. They quietly walked to the car.

"Thank you for everything, Nell." Kensi leaned over and hugged her fire headed friend. "I'll drive back in a few hours. After midnight of course, it'll technically be morning then," she forced a lopsided grin.

"Keep us posted."

With that, Kensi quickly went in the house and pulled her phone out.

"I need your help,"

"I heard about Deeks, how is he?"

"It was touch and go. Six hours, He's out of surgery, but won't be awake until the morning they said."

"I'm glad. Although, I'm surprised you're asking for my help. I know you aren't that fond of me."

"It's not that I don't like you. I don't like what you've put Deeks through."

"Kensi..."

"It's ok, but will you help me?"

"What do you need."

"I need to get in to see Nicole."

"Is that really a good idea?"

"She almost took my husband form me, leaving my baby without a father."

"You're pregnant? I hadn't heard. Congratulations."

"We actually just found out not that long ago. I'm about 10 weeks."

"Well congratulations. Now I'll repeat that question even more, are you sure it's a good idea."

"Thank you and need to do this, please."

A few minutes went by with no response. Kensi texted back, "Please," she was hoping the desperation she felt was displayed in her text.

A response came. "I'll contact Bates and see what I can do. IA is not a favorite of LAPD. We're kinda persona non grata."

"Do what you can, tell it's for Deeks. He respects him, even if he doesn't admit it."

"So do I, respect Deeks that is, even if you don't see it."

"Thank you, Detective Whiting."

"Call me Ellen."

"Alright then, Thank you Ellen.

Kensi showered then decided she should probably force herself to eat something. She really wanted the tub of rocky road calling her name from the freezer, but she decided on an orange and a banana instead. "I'm not fully giving up my sweets little one, but I'll compromise for you."

She headed to the precinct an hour later after Detective Ellen Whiting texted her that Bates agreed as long as she would stay with Kensi while talking to the woman in custody for setting up to kill her husband.

"Kensi, it's nice to see you again. Wish it wasn't for this, he's tough though, he's gonna be back to his ridiculously talkative self in no time."

"I hope so. Thank you for meeting me."

"I know you think I'm holding Deeks confession over his head, honestly, I use it only when I need his help."

"You know that he would help you without the threats."

Whiting looked down, "I realize that. All these years with Internal Affairs, most cops run the other way when they see me coming."

"Deeks isn't like most cops."

"I've noticed. He is one of the good guys."

"Yes, yes he is. I hope you remember that moving forward."

"I will do my best, for the record, I'm not planning on passing any of my closed case information over to the new IA detective."

Kensi looked at her confused. "New IA detective?"

"I'm turning in my badge at the end of the year. That gives me time to finish up all the open cases I have. I decided I need to focus on my son. It's time, He'll be 12 soon. This job takes up too much time between investigations, I want to finish watching him grow up."

Kensi admired the detectives decision. She knew she would be at the same cross roads sooner rather than later. Ones that scared her.

"What will you be doing? Career change?"

"I heard Deeks' bar may be in need of a waitress now that business is booming."

"What? Are you serious?"

"Not a chance in hell," the detective smiled.

"Best of luck to you Ellen, now the reason for our meeting, Bates is on board?"

"Not sure what you did to him, he's a bit frightened of you. I have to stay, that's the condition."

"Understood, I guess I can be a bit scary."

"Why do you think I never went true toe to toe with you. I'm tough, but I'm not sure I'd stand a chance. Especially where Detective Deeks is concerned."

Kensi felt a bit embarrassed. "I protect what's mine," she shrugged.

"I'm well aware. You're sure about this."

"I need to look her in the eye. She almost cost me everything."

"Alright, after you."


	15. Chapter 15

"Daddy?" The little girl whispered.

"Yes my little princess?"

"Thank you for not leaving me."

Deeks felt a pang in his heart. "I will never leave you my little princess."

"Daddy?"

"Yes?"

"Why do you call me little princess? I'm getting bigger now. I'm this many,". Deeks could see her hold up 5 fingers.

"Ha, that you are. But you see, your mama is my princess. She always has been, so that makes you my little princess."

He could see the little girl beam the Same smile as her mother. The smile he loved. The smile that got him through a lot. The smile he couldn't wait to see again.

His body was no longer lying beneath him, he was firmly planted. He was still sedated, but the dreams were vividly running through his brain.

The nurses checked him frequently, finally lowering the sedation rate. They admired the strength of the man they were caring for. Hearing the stories of his long surgery and how he fought to live every time he coded. They all kept a pact to keep this man comfortable and help him recover to the best of their abilities.

A fully sterile Hetty Lange, with all her powerful connections, was allowed to enter the room where Deeks was lying, yet to wake up.

"Ms. Lange, Dr. Golden informed us you'd be coming. Right this way."

Hetty sat in the chair provided for her next to her detective's bed. "Oh, Mr. Deeks. How I hate these familiar circumstances. I sent Kensi home to rest. I didn't give her a choice, I know you would agree, I promised her she would be able to return before you wake. Not like the last time I sent her away. I'm so sorry for the torture You endured, I don't believe I've ever told you that. I do wonder had I not sent her to Afghanistan , would you two have gotten in your own way and not be where you are today. As horrible as those events were, I do believe it made you appreciate and long for each other even more. I believe Kensi was able to bury her own ghosts of the past. I believe you inches closer to knowing she was destined to be yours. I cherish you both beyond belief. I couldn't be more pleased that the two of you are preparing to start a family. You both deserve it more than you know. Now if we can get Mr Callen moving forward." She smiled squeezing Deeks' hand.

Kensi and Whiting entered the holding room where Nicole had been settled. She rolled her eyes upon seeing Kensi. She was sitting at a table where Kensi positioned herself across from.

"What do you want?"

"I want to know why you would TRY to kill my husband?"

"Too bad I didn't succeed."

It took Kensi every thing in her to not jump the table and pummel Nicole. Whiting eyed the fuming woman and placed her hand on Kensi's shoulder.

"I'm not sure you know that I will do anything in my power to protect my family. Deeks is my world and you're going away for a long time for what you tried to do!" Kensi was attempting to calm her anger.

"Whatever, it would ha e been worth it if I took him from you!"

Kensi's eyes fumed. Ellen was there beside her to calm her again. "Not worth it Kensi," even though IA couldn't touch federal agents, she needed to make sure Kensi wouldn't do anything she later regretted.

"And, Who are you," Nicole let out with a snark in her tone as she looked Whiting over.

"I'll be your worst nightmare if you try anymore funny business."

Kensi looked at the detective with admiration. She may have been a pain in the ass over the last few years, but she risked her life to help when Ferris kidnapped her and she kept Deeks out of prison upon his confession. Now here she was helping out Kensi, for no real reason at all.

"Let me repeat my question, why did you try to kill my husband?"

"Because he killed me."

"From what I see you're still very much alive." Kensi harshly pointed out.

"Ray and Him, they broke who I was. He used me and left me. He doesn't deserve to be happy."

For a minute, Kensi felt sorry for the woman who was so enraged with hatred. Then it hit her, She had once fell in love with a lie, just as Nicole did. Kensi knew that feeling all too well. As much as Jack broke her, she was never happy when she thought he had died, on top of that she had a mission to kill him, and purposely missed the shot, when she realized he was very much alive and her target. She couldn't imagine killing someone over being hurt. Kensi realized at one time she was too consumed by hurt, but the man she loved know, made it all worth while. She couldn't understand what drove this woman to the brink of murder.

"I still don't understand why. I've been hurt as well, You could have moved on. Learned to let someone truly love you, like I did. I was broken too, but Deeks put me back together. Someone could have done that for you, if you let them. Instead you ruined your life." Through her rage, this incredible woman still found compassion for someone who almost took everything away from her.

Whiting looked at Kensi in awe. She could see why Deeks would gonto the ends of the Earth for her.

Nicole huffed. "You think he loves you, he's not capable of love."

Kensi again felt rage. This woman did not know Deeks. She knew Max. Max may not have been capable of love, but Deeks, Deeks was the most loving man she ever had known. Her heart sunk knowing she doubted him leading to this predicament. Kensi was about to rebuttal, when Whiting spoke.

"I'm going to interject here, I've seen how much Detective Deeks loves his wife. The way he looks at her. They way he puts his own safety at risk to protect her. To possibly throw away his freedom, in order to make sure she has another day on this planet. You may have known his undercover, but if you for one minute believe that man is not capable of love, you have another thing coming."

"If He was so in love with you," she glared at Kensi, "then why was it so easy to convince you he was cheating on you. Or maybe you don't love him as much as you say."

There was no holding Kensi back. She grabbed Nicole and put her face close to hers, "That was my mistake. One I won't make again. I had an emotional break."

"Oh right, Ray told me you're expecting. That should have been me!" The woman began to get angry yelling and ranting back. "You don't deserve each other!"

"You're going away for a very long time. I hope you get the help you need." Kensi sighed as Whiting calmed her again. Kensi rose up out of the chair realizing there was not much else to say. She had her answers, and as enraged as she felt for what Nicole had done, the damage she inflicted, she also couldn't help but feel terrible for what she had been through as well. She herself had a similar situation but that did not drive her to kill, even when she was ordered to. Nicole had put her own nail in her coffin and she wouldn't be able to hurt them again. Whiting followed behind Kensi after instructing the officer to take Nicole to lock up.

"I meant what I said, about how much he loves you. I saw it in his eyes when you were taken. He risked himself for you."

"I appreciate it. I really should have never thought otherwise. I guess it really is this growing peanut in my belly. It didn't even phase me twice when we're implying he had a thing for Tiffany, I knew he'd never have another thing with anyone but me. He's always been my rock. I feel like if I wouldn't have jumped to conclusions and would have listened, we'd be home watching Titanic. He watches it every time I ask with no complaints."

"Pregnancy tends to fog rationale thinking. For what it's worth, I apologize for the Tiffany comment."

"Do you think you'll miss it? The cases. The action, being a detective."

"I think there will be an emptiness. I know my son will fill that void though. I can always come back to law enforcement when he goes to college. Or again maybe the bar will look more appealing."

"It's nice to see this side of you."

"I'm not always all business. Can I give you some advice?"

Kensi shrugged with a nod.

"Enjoy every moment. Cherish every milestone. It's passes by in a blink of an eye. You've helped people countless times and I see your internal struggle. Hell, I've felt it myself."

"That obvious, huh?"

"I felt the same when I got pregnant. I put more into the job though after I had him. I missed a lot. Don't miss anything."

"I don't know who I'll be if I'm not Wonder Woman saving the world as Deeks would say."

"Sounds like him."

"This has been my identity, I mean. I'm happy, I really am and Deeks, when he found out he was over the moon, even if it wasn't under the best circumstances. I love seeing him happy. I, I'm afraid. What if I'm not good at this. I'm good at my job, but motherhood. I didn't have a good example. My mom and I are close now, but I lost the important years with her. The ones I would have learned from."

"From what I've seen, you have a strong team, a strong family behind you, use them. They'll be there. Trust yourself. You don't strike me as someone who takes failure lightly."

"No, no I don't."

"You're gonna do great Kensi. Deeks too. Give Him my best."

Kensi took Whiting's words to heart. She felt stronger than she had since she found out she was pregnant. She placed a hand on her still flat stomach. "We're gonna figure this out little one, we always do."

Kensi was anxious to get back to the hospital. She promised Hetty she wouldn't return until the morning. She knew she wouldn't sleep well without him, she also knew she couldn't sleep in ICU. Unhappily, she headed home. She figured Monty could probably use some snuggle time, and he'd have to be a substitute for Deeks. He was sure scruffy enough she thought trying to make herself laugh, like he would do. When she walked in the door, it felt empty.

"How is he Hetty," she texted.

"Resting. They are beginning to lower his sedation. Why don't you come back around 6am. You can get a few hours of sleep."

"Not sure I will, but I'll try."

"Please do so, and refrain from stressing yourself."

Kensi wondered if Hetty knew what she'd been up to. She's sure she did knowing Henrietta Lange.

Kensi pulled on a pair of sweats and her favorite LAPD tee shirt of Deeks'. She pulled Monty into bed with her scratching his ears. "I miss daddy too. You're gonna have a little human sibling, soon. So you're gonna need to stay strong for a while, cause we've sure hit a few bumps lately boy."

Monty looked up at her panting happily. Kensi drapes her arm around her substitute bed mate and fell asleep.

Kensi jumped awake when she heard a knock at her door. It was nearing 5am, she wasn't sure who would be at their house so early.

"Hey Wikipedia," Ray said smiling at the door.

"It's pretty early Ray, or Charlie sorry."

"It's fine, either one," the man chuckled nervously

"Is Deeks alright? Were you at the hospital?"

"Everything is good as far as I know. The little ninja lady told me you'd be heading there around 6. I wanted to talk to you."

"Ok?" She questioned with her eyes. "Come in."

"I...I don't even know where to begin. If he would have died and not got the chance to be a dad. I can't even."

"Hey, this is not your fault."

"It sure feels that way. I set him with Nicole, so I could be with Jenna. I'm a good dad, but Marty he's gonna be even better. We used to sit and talk how we'd raise our kids different. He was always a role model for me. I love him like a brother."

"And you protected him like a brother. You're risking your witness protection by coming to help save him."

"Man, you really are a good one." He took a deep breath, "I put him in the situation."

"His job put him in the situation. I don't blame you, and neither will he."

Ray shook his head in disbelief at Kensi's understanding. He had seen the stubborn side of her and was going to keep pushing his guilt out. "We're relocating again. I'll be heading out after he wakes up. I wanna see him and give him a few kicks in the ass for not giving me that call. He's gonna be great at the dad thing. You're gonna be a good mom too. I'll se up up at the hospital."

She hugged the man Deeks called one of his best friends before he walked out the door. Kensi put her back against the door after closing it. She was ready to be with her husband and start his recovery.


	16. Chapter 16

Kensi arrived at the hospital. Hetty was there to greet her.

"Did you sleep well, My dear?"

"Not as well as I will, when he is back home."

Hetty nodded with understanding.

"Well, we need to get you scrubbed up and in sterile clothing. Your husband will be waking shortly and if I were a betting woman, which I am, I'd say he would like you to be the first thing he sees."

Kensi smiled hoping that was true. She wasn't sure why she felt a pang of doubt, she knew it was true. Hetty led her down the hall, outside his sterile room. He looked pale hooked up to all the machines. She absolutely did not miss the last time he looked so weak. She scrubbed and and got into a sterile gown the nurses left for her. She inhaled deeply and slowly exhaled. She wanted to examine every wound and kiss his injuries, but she knew she could not. She entered the room and took the seat Hetty was previously occupying. She sat down quietly and put his hand in hers. She laid her head gently on his leg and closed her eyes.

Images of a shaggy haired man, white tee shirt, red shorts, black socks, ran through her mind. She was surely smitten. Not that she would ever admit that to Callen and Sam back then. His baby blues and fluffy hair intrigued her. When she found out who she was and was first partnered with the detective, she found Him quite annoying, however, and wasn't thrilled about their pairing. Yet, Kensi Blye, tough exterior, walls 10 feet high, was professional and would do her missions as told, with whoever she was assigned. That didn't stop her from complaining.

"He has trust issues, Callen. Can't you speak with Hetty."

"Trust issues?" She recalled Callen teasing her, "says the girl who never has second dates, won't tell anyone how she really feels, it's like the pot calling the kettle black."

"I.. eh," she shrugged.

"Give it time. Building a partnership as awesome as Sam I have takes time."

Kensi's eyes fluttered as memories swept through her. She remembered him saving her from the laser room. That was the moment she first really trusted him. She trusted him to get her back and he did. An unconventional way, like most things he did, but he got her back none the less and helped her escape the room, together, he never left her, even if it meant he'd die too. He always had her back. She lifted her head and stared at him.

"You've always had my back," she whispered. "I should have had yours. I'm so sorry, baby," she ruffled his hair for him. He stirred a bit and raised his eye lids but they still didn't open. How she longed to see those ocean blue eyes.

Her heart sunk thinking of the numerous times he had been hospitalized. She was at his side for most. She regretted not being there after Sidorov tortured him, but she had a job to do. She was there when he was shot the first time, waiting for him to wake up. Then, Ripping himself from his bed, he had to save her again. He really was saving her often. She'd have to remember to thank him properly for that.

She remembered him helping Ray at all costs, and she remembered watching his lips connect with Nicole's. She felt sick to her stomach as she pictured the intimacy between them. She grew more ill when she thought about what she did to him because she had once loved him without that true love in return. She thought about Ray and Deeks conversation, he thought she couldn't hear. She was only a few feet away with her back turned. She felt her face flush again the same way it did when she heard Ray.

"You two got a thing," she heard Ray say.

"ya we have had a thing, Alright," Kensi laughed slightly.

Ray called it all those years ago. Were they really that transparent, she wondered staring at him, full heart of love. She guessed Ray finally got his answer ten years later, under less than stellar circumstances, but it was nice to see him. Deeks would be happy to get a chance to visit with him, even if only for a few minutes before he returned to witness protection.

She laid her head back on his legs. Her eyes were feeling heavy again, but she felt too overwhelmed to sleep.

"You ok?" She heard Callen's voice in a fog. Everything was foggy.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Cause we kept this mission from you."

"I get it, I do. I just haven't felt that hopeless for a long time." She took a minute to pause thinking about her father's death. "Hetty said she's in my debt, so I guess that's something to be thankful for."

"I'd like to have Hetty in my debt," Callen smiled patting her back.

"Hey," Deeks walked in after Callen headed out of the armory.

"Hey."

"Still pissed at me?"

Kensi shrugged.

"Still thinking about slitting my jugular?"

Kensi shrugged again.

"Still busy every night for the rest of your life?"

Kensi shrugged again this time speaking, "maybe"

"Maybe, ok. That's a start." He gave her that big smile with his beautiful teeth. His real teeth back then and not his beautiful veneer.

She realized she must have doses off a few minutes remembering that day. She rubbed Deeks hand, hoping he would wake soon. She looked at her watch. It was only 7am. The nurse came in to check his vitals.

"Do you think he will be waking soon?" Kensi desperately inquired.

"Hard to say, but we have switched from sedation to a milder pain medication. Hopefully that will help."

"Thank you."

"I'm Sally, if you need anything, please let us know. We all made a pact to take care of him the best we can. We see his strength. Working here as long as some of us, you know the patients without knowing them."

Kensi gave a warm smile. "He's an amazing man."

Kensi began feeling uncomfortable but didn't want to leave his side. She was hoping he'd wake soon and be able to make room for her in his bed. Truthfully, she was surprised Hetty hadn't arranged a bed for her, but being ICU, she figured the hospital had to draw lines somewhere.

She thought about Granger, how she missed him. She was very uncertain of him when he first showed up at The mission. Accusations of Kensi killing men that could have been involved in her father's death, hung over her then. Granger proved to be a valuable part of their operations. Despite their first encounter. He would have been happy to see where Kensi and Deeks had gotten to. He was someone her father trusted and that knowledge later opened her up to trusting Granger. During the investigation into her connection in the cases, she wasn't sure who to trust during that time, so she inevitably turned to Deeks. Their bond had been growing and he proved time and time again to be valuable partner. Thinking back, she wondered when she actually began to truly fall in love with him. The lines seemed to always have been blurred, but she couldn't pinpoint the exact moment. Then she remembered the uncover operation. Justin and Melissa, she enjoyed living that life with him. She wondered if it could be even better in reality. Although they were working a case, it was different. There was lots of down time, to be a pretend couple. Now here they were a real couple, having 9 months off together, bringing a baby into the world, she was in awe. She just stared at her husband, almost willing him to wake up. She was becoming restless. She walked over to the window and looked out.

She watch the road as men loaded up boxes and began to giggle. The box...the infamous box! "He better find that box!" She thought, although she always admired his strength and willpower not to open said box. Maybe it was more fear, whatever it was, he resisted, to this day, the box inside the box had yet to be opened. She thought about how it paralleled their thing, Always building it up.

"Whose to say it won't be a huge let down."

"We are still talking about the box, right?"

"You always know what I'm thinking, even when I'm not sure I want you to,"she walked back over to him. "Like when I was jealous of your little op with that slut Monica. Ok that wasn't very nice, and the green eyed monster obviously lives inside of me still." She let out air she drew in. "Baby, I really need you to wake up and kiss me like that again, it was a good form of communication" she whispered in his ear thinking about those communication skills or lack there of. Who could she kid, until they went all in, she was often jealous, never after really until that night she received the pictures. She trusted him with everything, but Part of the reason, besides her hormones, she flipped out about the Talia pictures, was the way the agent always looked at her Deeks, always flirting.

"What's shaking partner?"

"Who the hell is she calling partner? Are you serious. I'm his partner!" She had been screaming in her head that day. "Partners, ugh, that word was my least favorite word anyway, we always used it to hide our impending thing."

"I'm not here to poach you're boyfriend"

"Deeks is not my boyfriend."

"I wish he was," Kensi recalled thinking. "I want to feel him make love to me again. I want him to be beside me, kissing me, loving me like only he can. Yes he has changed my oil as you so idiotically say. Then they sent me away. Now we are back on this damn frozen lake, and you got another thing coming if you think I'm gonna let you crack the ice I'm halfway across." Kensi really didn't remember much of the words Talia kept rambling, the next thing she remembered was head butting her nose. "That's gonna leave a mark, what's wrong with me, I'm like a high school girl." She shook her head at the thought. "I was the idiot, an idiot head over heels in love."

Kensi whispered in his ear again, "we could go back to the desert for some hot desert sex, you just need to get better." She swore she could see his lips curl up a bit. "Martin Deeks?" But he still didn't wake. "If you're faking again!" Although she knew he wasn't faking in Mexico, but she liked to torment him about it. Somehow it made her feel better. It was probably the single most scariest moment in her life. Even more frightening than her own inability to walk. She wondered what he had whispered to her in her coma. She relived Mexico, He was freezing cold in the 100 degree desert. She thought he was dead. She felt relieved when she felt a pulse and laid her body as close to his as she could. When he woke up, she was beyond relieved, even if she wasn't sure where they stood. She couldn't remember the pain in her body and exhaustion from dragging him, she chuckled hoping the same thing would be true of child birth, Not remembering the pain. She remembered the terrible fight on the garage roof, before they left for Mexico. The look in his eyes when he suggested they shouldn't get married. How that moment killed her, not only the suggestion, but the look of hurt she caused. The same look he had when she asked him to leave after accusing him of cheating on her with Talia. Now he's lying here before her again, fighting for his life. It seemed they barely fought, but when they did, it was always at the worst moments followed by some near death experience. Perhaps this was a sign, they should absolutely have no more fights.

"I love you til the end of time and back," her words came out as they did when she faced an uncertain future after a fight over grilled cheese. Such a trivial thing, yet could have been the last things they said to one another, hence why she would not go in that tunnel without calling him. He needed to know she loved him through thick and thin.

All she could do was pace the room. The thoughts of their road travelled began to calm her a bit. All the memories of good and bad times, they really did always figure it out.

She found herself placing her hand on her belly more. Still completely flat, she wondered how she would look. Deeks told her she looked amazing, but he did have a traumatic brain injury and it was a dream he was having.

"He also said you were a boy in his dream, but now he's convinced you're a girl. I wonder what you'll be. What you'll look like. I can't wait to hear your daddy sing twinkle twinkle little star to you too. He was so nervous when I was holding that baby in the hospital years ago," she smiled as big as she could thinking about her husband singing to their child.

He was always good with kids. Hell, he's still a big kid. Every case they encountered where they had contact with a young child, he showed his strength. He made a young girl smile, occupied the black widows son, he just had a instinct with kids. She knew she would rely on him more than the opposite with their baby.

She thought about their wedding. Sunshine and Gunpowder all around. She was happy she proposed, but wished she had remembered his very romantic proposal while she was in a coma. He seemed very proud of that one. She thought he was going to propose during that stupid word game in front of their senior partners, but instead it was a dance he requested. He worked so hard to impress her she thought. "You did a good job too, babe, until you dropped me," but then knowing they Were alone, he leaned on top of her and kissed her passionately.

"Bring the dress with, you can return it tomorrow," he said in a husky voice that made her knees feel like jello. The night that followed at home took her breath away.

She pushed him away at the real proposal with the ring, still regretting that decision today. "You've always been by my side, I thought I was protecting you from a life of misery, but I was being selfish and pitying myself. I'd never leave you if you couldn't walk."

She was giddy at the semi real proposal in the hallway at work, but no matter how it happened, it finally did and they made it, almost two years later, to the wedding through all the previous doubts and derailments.

She began to feel more relaxed than she had in the past 36 hours. She felt more ready for their next mission. She was happier their communication skills had improved. The frozen lake was difficult but not impossible to cross. Her walls crumbled for him. His walls crumbled for her. They were destined for one each other and one Henrietta Lange knew that. She didn't know how her boss knew everything everyone needed, except Where Christmas gifts were concerned, that was her getting rid of things she didn't want.

"I'm going to eat all your green jello, if you don't wake up soon."

"Don't you dare, Fern," he groggily spoke and forced his eyes to open.

"Baby!" She sighed exasperatedly.

"I could probably use a sponge bath too," he attempted to sit up. "Ow, ok that hurt."

"Be careful, please take it easy."

"I feel like a gutted fish." He smirked.

"That is so not funny."

"I need to kiss you," he gave her his best puppy eyes.

"You can't kiss me,"

"I need to kiss you." He emphasized.

"You can't risk an infection. They took your spleen."

"Did They?"

"Yes, they did."

"Do I need my spleen?"

"It helps fight infections genius."

"What do you have cooties? Kensi Marie Deeks has cooties."

She rolled her brown eyes, "if I have cooties they came from you."

"Touché."

And then the tears began flowing. An uncontrollable river poured out her eyes. She was happy, sad, afraid, grateful, anger, fear, a fireball mix of emotions that roared through her veins like like fire and the only thing that could cool her was the water from her eyes. He alwaysbcould joke through the worst times, but she couldn't laugh this time.

"Baby, I'm ok. Really, just sore. Really, really sore, but I'm alive."

"Barely."

"I'm good, I'm strong, well moderately strong, ok, I'm really not strong right now, but I will be."

"You're still an idiot," she pushed a crooked smile through her crocodile tears.

"Hey, I love you."

"I love you."

"You good?"

"I'm fine!"

"Really, fine?"

"Fine, No, I'm not fine, I'm not good," she sobbed out.

"Come here," he fought through the pain to move over and give her room on the bed.

She snuggled close to him smelling the sea through the the sterility. "I don't wanna do this without you!"

He pulled up her chin, "You're not going to. You and me were good, we always are."

"You codes four times Deeks!"

"But I survived."

"You're always risking your life for me."

"I will always put you above me. That's what love is, baby. Like Titanic, Jack sacrifices himself to save Rose. You may not be my Rose, but you're my Fern and I'll always save you, even if I have to risk my own safety. I'm not going to ever let anyone hurt you, or our baby."

Kensi had no words for this. She wanted to kiss him right there more than anything. "I love you so much."

"I love you, so very much." A feeling Suddenly came over him, "our daughter pleaded with me not to go."

"What?" She said mimicking the day he told her a love story was what happened next.

"I saw her, we were surfing. I told her she needed to be brave and take care of you, then she cried please don't go, daddy. Then I felt myself falling."

Kensi looked at him oddly.

"I don't how I know that, I just do."

"I had a dream you were surfing with our daughter, as well, then a wave came and I lost you both."

"You're not gonna lose either one of us."

"I hope not."

"Besides, I told you we are having a girl," he placed his hand on her stomach.

She shook her head at him, "and after Mexico you said you envisioned me pregnant and you asked how is he...a boy."

"Ya but you weren't actually pregnant then, plus I had a brain injury, it was sloshing all over, even more importantly, Hetty said it was a girl too, and I'm pretty sure Hetty knows everything."

"Eh, she does."

"Anyway, I already promised you I wouldn't die on you, and I am a man of my word."

"That you are Martin Deeks, that you are."

She snuggled in closer again and gently put her head on his chest looking up at him as he winced in pain. She started to move, but his arm stopped her.

"Stay here, right were you belong, next to me."


	17. Chapter 17

Shortly around noon, Deeks woke up with Kensi dosing still on his chest. Deeks laud he's head against Kensi's hair. "Mmmm" he sniffed.

"Are you smelling my hair again?" Kensi woke looking at his scruffy face.

"What?" He googled eyes at her.

"I told you to never do that again."

"And I said no promises. I missed the lavender scent."

"You're so weird." She smirked.

Dr. Golden came to check on his patient a few minutes later. He glazed over the couple. Henrietta had filled him in on theirs intense love. He immediately could see it.

"You're looking better, Mr. Deeks," he stated. "We have not met, but I was in surgery with you, I'm Dr. Golden."

"Thanks for saving me there Doc, I heard I left the land of the living a few times."

Kensi glared at her husband, "if you weren't hurt, I'd punch you."

"Don't worry Fern, I can feel it with your eyes."

"I'm sorry my husband is an idiot, Dr."

Dr. Golden chuckled. "Henrietta informed me of how cheeky he can be, as she put it."

Deeks smiles widely. "Of course she did."

"I'm going to have another room set up for you shortly in the new wing that just opened. You will be our first patient there. I will allow 2 visitors at a time, as long as the have no visible signs of illness and they sterilize and adorn scrubs. You have many people anxious to see you."

"Wow, how do I rate such treatments, or should I even ask."

"The wing is named for its donor." The doctor explained.

The couple looked at each other, "Hetty."

The doctor smiled with acknowledgement. "I'll instruct the nurses to make sure to have a pullout bed placed in there for you, Mrs. Deeks."

"Thank you, for everything."

"My pleasure, besides I told you my life depended on it."

Deeks looked intrigued at Kensi, "Not me," she smiled. Deeks nodded knowing his listed next of kin would not let him die if she had a say.

After Deeks was settled in his new home for the next week, his first visitor was allowed in.

"You sure are a sight for sore eyes." Ray came in fully scrubbed.

"Hey man, what are you doing here?"

"When one's crazy ex wife comes to kill a man's best friend, the little Ninja lady calls in reinforcements."

"Hmm," deeks ran his hand through the back of his hair. "Jenna and the baby? Well, not a baby anymore, I'm guessing?" Deeks couldn't believe it had been years since he'd seen the man before him.

"Ray Martin, after two great kids who bonded over bad fathers," Ray winked "already being relocated to our new home, Oregon was not for me. I need the ocean."

Deeks smiles widely. "You didn't need to risk your life for me brother. Coming out of witness protection is dangerous."

"I didn't have a choice, man, I'm partly responsible for this mess," Ray responded with a twinge of guilt.

"It's the past, time to move forward, both of us, right?" Deeks reached out his hand.

"Right, Man." Accepting the gesture. "So you and Wikipedia? I see you're thing worked out," he jested. "I knew you two had a thing."

"Even though he said there was no thing!" Kensi interjected.

"Did I though." Deeks cracked.

"And I repeat," Kensi grinned, "there is No Thing, no thing..."

"Then I suppose I was wrong,"

"I suppose you were," She kissed his forehead.

"I don't have a lot of time, I have to head out in an hour. I just wanted to stop by and see you, alive, not being carried out half dead on a stretcher." Ray began.

"I'll give you two some time," Kensi headed to the door.

"Don't be long, Kensalina, I need you to give me my sponge bath. Green jello would be nice, too."

"Keep it up," Kensi's smile lit up his heart. She was glad to have her jokester of a husband back.

"I almost cost you all that, man I'm sorry," Ray was still feeling guilty.

"I almost cost me all of it. I was stupid. I should have let them back me up, left my phone on, coms. I'm a detective, that's been working for NCIS, I know better. I never thought Nicole was capable of what she did. I knew she hated me and was hurt by the lies, but the extremes she went to."

"She did sell me out for $100,000."

"You were cheating on her."

"You did lie to her and pretended to be someone else."

"I guess we were both asses to her then," Deeks sighed. "The part of the job I hate."

"What's in store for you next?"

"Kensi and I gotta figure it out. What we want next."

"I think you two got this," Ray encouraged.

"What's it like?" Deeks pondered.

"What's what like?"

Deeks blew out a deep breath, "being a dad?"

Ray had been standing next to Deeks' side. He pulled up a chair and sat down. "Absolutely amazing. He's grown so fast." Ray pulled out a few pictures. "I love it." He looked at his friend with concern. "You ok?"

"Worried, what if I'm not good at it."

"I was worried every day after we left. It comes natural man, when you see that tiny face you created looking back at you helplessly. You fall in love and It's the greatest feeling in the world."

"Kensi nervous too, she won't admit it, being Wonder Woman and all, but I can read her."

"There is no doubt in my mind, you are going to be the most amazing father. That kid is gonna be lucky to have you and Wikipedia as parents. May know a lot of useless knowledge, but that can come in handy when referencing the difference between crocodiles and alligators."

Deeks laughed wincing in pain, "ow, that felt good man. To laugh. A wise very large man once told me laughing is good. You take care of yourself and Jenna and Ray Martin, I mean a name like that, he's set."

Ray nodded. "Remember, We had examples of what not to be, use that to know how to be." He finished hugging his childhood friend and left to start his new witness protection identity.

Kensi he'd been walking down the corridor towards the cafeteria. Deeks mentioned green jello, immediately Kensi began craving it. "It's gonna be a long seven months," she huffed.

When she hit the cafeteria she saw Sam and Callen.

"Kens," Callen called her over.

"Hey guys."

"How's he doing?" Sam asked.

"Putting on a strong humorous face. He's in pain, I can tell."

"He went through a lot," Sam told her.

"Don't remind me." She put her eyes down. "You guys taking Ray back?"

"No, Hetty is. She said she pulled him out of protection, she wanted to take him back." Callen told her.

"That's good." Kensi nodded with approval.

"Hetty said we could see him today?" Callen questioned.

"Of course. He'd like that."

"Why don't you go home for a while. Take care of Monty. We'll stay with him," Sam suggested.

"You know that's not gonna happen. Hetty was lucky she ordered me out. The doctor set me up with a pullout couch bed in his room. Mama Deeks is taking care of Monty. I had to tell her we needed to reconnect. Deeks hates worrying her. Her response, and I quote, "don't come home without Making me a grand baby."

"You haven't told her?" Callen laughed.

"We haven't had a chance. I haven't even told my mom. If I tell my mom, she'll tell Roberta, can't do that to her again."

"I'll keep you're secret, for now. You know how persuasive she can be," Callen came back with.

"You two have gotten pretty close?" Kensi responded.

"We've bonded." Callen smirked.

"Ya, remember G don't sleep," Sam through in.

"Roberta likes to do inventory late, I like a free beer when I'm tinkering."

"Just give us some time to tell her, ok. And don't tell her what happened to Deeks."

"That's a wrath I'd rather not face." Callen promised.

"Let me grab some green jello for Baby Deeks and then we can head over to Deeks room," Kensi informed.

"Cravings?" Sam asked.

"Oh, this little one wouldn't mind some either," she said rubbing her belly. "I was talking about for the big baby Deeks," Kensi joked as she felt comforted by her makeshift brothers by her side to support her and Deeks through his recovery.


	18. Chapter 18

The boys and Kensi returned to Deeks' room, jello in tow. The nurses decided Kensi was not to be counted as a visitor and allowed the three to enter.

"Look what the cat dragged in," Deeks winked.

"I see they didn't cut your humor out, that's a shame," Callen teased.

"Excuse me? Are u calling me a cat now?" Kensi glared.

"Never baby, I'm the only jungle cat. Did you bring my jello?"

"Ya she said baby Deeks needed it, I thought she was talking about the one she's carrying, but turns out she meant you," Sam jabbed in.

"Listen," Deeks grew serious. "I should have let you guys have my back. Thanks for finding me."

"You should have, we'll always have your back man," Sam insisted.

"I'm certain my wife won't let me forget."

"Got that straight," Kensi agreed.

"How long you out for?" Sam questioned earning a look from Kensi and Deeks at each other.

"Hetty instructed nine months," Deeks looked down. "Guess ur losing us both for the time being."

"Maybe longer?" Callen asked worrying his teams' demise was sooner than later.

Kensi and Deeks again looked deeply at each other.

"We have a lot to discuss," Callen could see the sadness in Kensi's eyes as she spoke.

"Hey," Deeks encouraged, "we'll figure it out."

Kensi nodded. "Sam can call agent Dechamps to fill in, she loves being part of our team."

"Don't you start too." He smiled at Kensi.

Deeks slurped his jello, "only thing I like about hospitals."

"Kens, would you mind if I had some time alone with Deeks?" Callen quietly asked.

Kensi looked confused, "why?"

"Come on Kens, lets go get both babies some more jello, my treat," Sam said motioning her away from her husband.

"I'll take 5 cups on you Sam Dog," Deeks hollered back. Sam shook his head in disbelief as he walked away with Kensi.

Kensi and Sam walked down the corridor to the cafeteria. "What does Callen want to talk to Deeks about?"

"You need to take a break Kensi. You're going to drive yourself insane."

Kensi sighed. "How did things go so awry."

"Remember, problems only arise when ur running around trying to find solutions."

"More being, less doing."

"Be in the moment, Kensi. Enjoy every moment of your pregnancy, every moment watching that baby grow and instilling your values as it grows up. Maybe a little more you than Shaggy."

Kensi cracked a smile. "I'm still scared as hell, Sam. Too many changes all at once."

Sam turned and pulled Kensi to face him. "No matter what, where u go, what job you may or may not do, we will always be here for you, and your baby. And Deeks too I suppose."

"I know you love him Sam."

"That's our secret."

Kensi nodded, "you owe him 5 jellos."

"Ya," Sam smirked.

Back in Deeks' hospital room, Deeks pushed himself up in the bed. "Ah, I think I'm gonna give up fish tacos for awhile. Poor guys getting gutted for me to eat. I sure know how they feel."

Callen gave him a look, "probably shouldn't let Kensi heat you say that. How are you doing."

"Sore, but I'm still here, thanks to you, Sam and Ray."

"That's was stupid what you did."

Deeks ruffled his hair. "Look, I said I was sorry."

Callen pulled over the chair. "You should be happy it's me talking to you and not Sam. He won't be as gentle as you."

"You've been there Callen, Kensi's been there. Hell, Sam's been there with Tahere. We've all done things we wanted to handle on our own."

"Look how those turned out. If anything we need to each learn from each other's mistakes of going Rouge."

"What about finding your dad?"

"If I find anything, I have a family I'll call."

"Even if we're out?"

Callen looked down in silence.

"You know that's a possibility now right? But you know we'd come back to help you. Anything you need to find him."

"I know things are changing. I've been preparing myself, as much as I hate it, I know you've been wanting to move on for some time. Ever since our talk in the bar, I've been wondering what would finally push you to pull the trigger."

"Man, I love what we do, Kensi loves it more than I do, and we love doing it together, but how do We go out there everyday and risk not coming home to our child."

"Sam did,"

"Like you said, look how that turned out."

"Well, you, Kens and I had little parental influence, we did alright."

Deeks let out a chuckle, "ow, hurts to laugh."

"That's a shame for someone who's always cracking jokes."

"Touché. Honestly, Callen, I think about not having a normal parental upbringing. I know I don't have control over what happens, but I want Kensi and I both there to raise her."

"I don't want to lose you or Kensi, but I understand. Whatever you decide, we're still family. We'll be there for all the birthdays, milestones, whatever you need. I'll teach Sam how to be a good uncle."

"Appreciate that man,"

"No more lone wolf, for any of us though, agreed?"

"Agreed. Truth be told, We would be back in a heartbeat to find your father."

"I know. I'm gonna hold you to that if the day comes."

"You talk to your sister, lately?"

"No, she still blames me for letting them take our father. I can't blame her."

"Hopefully, we will get that chance to bring him home and reunite you guys again."

"That would be nice."

"Kensi's not gonna settle being a housewife. I don't want her to, I also don't want her life on the line daily. I'm over the moon about this baby, I'm worried she's not."

"It's been a rollercoaster of emotions the last few days. Support her, in all her moods."

"Can I be honest?" Deeks' blue eyes connected with Callen's as he nodded to say yes. "It still stings man, she thought I'd betray her like that. I mean I get the whole pregnancy shock, her hormones, she not real fun on her lady phase, if you know what I mean."

"I didn't need to know that, but working with you two every day, we notice things. We are highly trained agents."

"It goes deeper, ya know. I gotta let it go, it just sucks. I've always been there for her."

"She knows that Deeks."

"But what if I was right when I was freaking out about the wedding. What if I actually did con her to marry me. What if that's why she doubted me, I tricked her to love me."

"Seriously Deeks?"

"I don't know man, things were good til this, then, I just can't help thinking I'm the one that doesn't deserve her. That's she's finally realizing that." His hand ruffled his locks.

"I think the pain is going to your head."

Deeks sighed heavily. "I'm pretty convinced I conned my way into her heart, I tricked her into loving me! That's the only answer."

"Martin Deeks! What on Earth are you rambling about."

Shell shocked Deeks peeked around Callen and saw his wife balancing cups of jello, while slurping one down. A sheepish grin came across his lips. "Jello good?"

"Why would you say that?" She demanded.

"Well, I've had three cups so far and I think it's quite tasty!"

"Deeks!"

"Yes princess?"

"How could you ever think you could trick me into loving you?"

"I think that's our cue to leave, G,"

"Right behind you big guy." Callen followed and hugged Kensi. "Come by the bar later."

Kensi nodded. "Just keep Mama Deeks in the dark for now," She whispered back.

"I gotch your back."

Kensi eyed Deeks up and down. "You're ridiculous, you know that right?"

"Am I?" He replied half joking, half serious.

"Deeks!"

"Kensi!"

"Over 11 years Deeks, five years of games, lack of communicating, finally admitting to ourselves and each other, our wedding, a baby on the way and you think you conned me into loving you?"

"What if all the games just were a cover and a ploy, like reverse psychology. Teasing you until you think you love me. You don't even like me half the time."

Kensi didn't disagree.

"See!"

"I'm just gonna let you ramble on like the idiot you're being."

"Maybe I don't deserve you Kensi, I don't deserve this," he pointed to her belly that would soon blow up like a balloon.

"What's wrong with you right now?"

"I don't know." He paused. "Can I be honest with you?"

"I hope you're always honest with me."

"Touché "

"The morning of our wedding I was completely freaking out."

"What?"

"Somehow I ended up on Sam's boat. It must have been 3 or 4 in the morning. I was curled in the corner of his boat."

"Doing what?"

"I just told you, Freaking out!"

"About what?"

"You, me, why you love me. How you even love me. I realized then, somehow I swindled you." Deeks looked down.

"Martin Deeks, you look at me right now!" She pulled his face up to hers."

"Do I look like the kind of girl that can be tricked into falling in love. Especially with how high my walls were! Do I look like someone who would be so careless with my heart after what I've been through."

"I don't know, Kens. I can charm my way through almost anything. Maybe my charm deceived you. My Deekness is a excellent cover."

She glared at him, "Really Deeks?"

He shrugged.

"Deeks, babe, I love you. I have a feeling it's my fault you're thinking like this. I doubted you and I can never apologize enough. But let me say this, you NEVER conned me into loving you. In fact, I'm pretty sure I loved you from the moment I first saw you. The softness in you're eyes, even though I pinned you as a suspect, there was just something about you I was stuck on."

"It's not just that Kens, I'm still..." he paused, "I'm still scared to be completely happy."

"Is Mercury in retrograde again?"

His eyes looked up full of sadness. The bright blue turned a dull shade of grey.

"It's ok to be happy. We can be happy."

"Every time, I think it's ok to finally enjoy life, something else goes wrong. I want to enjoy this."

"A wise man once told me, and reminded me today, the only time problems arise is when you're busy running around trying to solve them."

"Sounds like Sam."

"Perhaps," she shrugged with a small smile, one he loved so much. "Remember when I said more being less doing, it's not Ninja crap as Talia so pleasantly called it, it's good advice. We have to enjoy the moment, Deeks. Just be, don't do."

"I love you," he took her hand.

"I love you," she returned. "For better or for worse."

**A/N: I love the Deeks freak out sneak peak and thought Id add that sentiment in this chapter enjoy! reviews loved**


	19. Chapter 19

Deeks had fallen asleep. Kensi watched her husband breathe steadily up and down. She played with his hand in hers. He had been home from the hospital a little over month now. Kensi's baby bump was slowly growing. She had been having terrible morning sickness, which unfortunately came at many times throughout the day and not just morning. She had slept most the day today, and was wide awake at 11pm. She scooted away from Deeks softly, as to not wake him. She headed down to the fridge to raid the leftovers. She was oddly restless tonight. After scarfing down the leftover pizza she found from earlier this evening, she decided she should rifle through some of the contents of the room set to be their baby's nursery.

Since the room had basically been storage for the last few years, Kensi knew they had a lot of work to do. She was thankful for the time off with Deeks, but was feeling anxious not working. She thought if she began sorting through the room, that would help get her started and give her something to do over the next several months. She spotted a box marked Wedding. She had meant to go through the photos and guestbook, but being an agent with a case load like theirs, the time never came. She grabbed the box and sat on the floor against the wall near the door. Memories of the amazing day came flooding over her. From Hetty's dramatic entrance, to Kirkin being handcuffed to Nell and Eric, to her and Deeks smiles that lit up the room. It may not have been perfect, but it was perfect for them. She glanced at a picture of her, Kat, Mindy, Mandy and the Tiffany's. She smiled as she remembered her conversation with a very hormonal, very pregnant Mandy. She remember surprising herself, saying she couldn't wait to look like her and wishing she was pregnant. She rubbed her growing belly. She began thinking that was the turning point and as scared as she was, and afraid that she wouldn't know who she was without being an agent, she couldn't be more happy. She finally knew who she was without NCIS, she was Kensi Deeks and she was soon going to have a purpose of protecting a new life. A life her and Deeks created. She looked at the pictures of her dad and Granger that had been stored with the wedding pictures. Roberta brought them along after her conversation with Kensi in the bar. Roberta was going to make sure the men were part of the day. Kensi shuffled around and pulled out a small, unfamiliar, wooden box. She took in in her hands and opened it. Inside she found two letters. The first was what she had written to Deeks all those years ago, even before they went all in. She smirked at her presentation of the key. A box inside a box, rigged with exploding snakes and then the key. Despite Nell's assistance, she never intended to switch the locker contents out. Even if their thing never panned out, he was still everything for her. She wanted him to know he had broken down her walls and taught her to love and to let someone love her. She often pondered where they would be now, had he opened that box sooner. She knew both their fears had gotten in the way time and time again. After she sent said box, there were times she questioned if she should empty the locker and play it off as a joke, but she trusted Nell to keep the other key just for that reason. She needed Deeks to know what he meant to her, even if he didn't reciprocate the feelings. She never really thought that to be the case though, as she always felt the same love and protection her father provided from the shaggy haired surfer. Albeit, it be a different kind of love, it made her feel safe nonetheless.

Deeks prized the ring and cherished it, as Kensi did him. He placed it on a chain and kept it in the same place they kept their own wedding bands, when they were on missions. Deeks could never bring himself to bring up the importance of such a gift. Kensi knew what it meant to him and he kept it safe and never lost it.

Kensi folded her letter back up and looked curiously at the one that was paired with it. Slowly she opened it.

My dearest Fern,

I'm sitting her on the balcony, over looking our beach, on our wedding night. Malibu, a place we've been so many times together, practically every weekend, Yet, somehow it feels different. I've never looked at this place as I am tonight. The ocean looks bluer, the sand looks whiter, It's the most beautiful place on Earth. Maybe, it's the fact that you're finally my wife, still sprawled out all starfish like on the glorious king size bed in our suite, beautifully exhausted from the wild events of today. The wedding, the dancing, and prior to, were pretty crazy as well. I hope that you know what that box meant to me, even before I ever opened it. It was always a symbol of our thing and the love story waiting to unfold. Not only did you entrusted me with your dads knife at one point, but now you have given me a token that meant so much to you. You were right, everything I ever wanted was in that box. To earn your trust, to earn your friendship, but most of all, to earn your love, has been the thing I wanted more than anything since I laid eyes on you. Every moment with you moving forward will become another one of my favorite moments, because I get to share it with you. I love you with all my heart and soul, Kensi Marie Deeks. I will spend everyday proving to you that you made the right choice in marrying me.

Love always,

Max. Aka Hubby

Kensi felt herself tear up. "Damn hormones," she whispered. She wondered why he never gave her the letter as she traced the words with her fingers.

Deeks watched her from the doorway. His heart had felt as happy as it did the moment they said their vows. Even after the hell of the last few months, they had gotten past it, as they always did. They were finally having a baby and would find out in the next month if he was right about the baby being a girl.

He entered the room and looked down at his beautifully pregnant wife. "Whatcha doing there, wifey?"

"Huh?" She looked up wiping her tears.

Deeks slid down and sat next to her. He winced as he was still slightly in pain while recovering. He saw her holding the note he had written.

She looked wide eyed at him. "Why didn't you ever give this to me?"

Deeks shrugged running his hand through his styled by pillow hair. "I thought it might be overkill. I was feeling so elated. I wanted to always remember how I felt at that moment. I was too wired to sleep. Then the night you kicked me out..."

Kensi cringed at his words. That was a day she regretted. "Deeks,"

"Kens, I'm over it, but I longed for that letter. I wanted to go inside the box I placed my letter with yours and read both of them. I needed to remember what we were, what we are to one another. I wanted to keep hope that we'd get through that. I grabbed this box and put it in my bag. I read both of them over and over. It probably sounds Crazy."

"I think it sounds beautiful."

"I put the box with our wedding stuff when I came back home." He paused briefly. "I never asked you,"

"Hmm?"

"Was that always what was in the locker? Nell, said the key was a fail safe in case we didn't work out."

"Or if you lost the box, which technically you did."

"Touché. So?"

"The ring and that letter were always there."

"Wow," he stuttered out.

"That's it? Just wow?"

"I don't know, I guess I thought you put it there more recently. I never realized that's how you felt for so long. I mean I did, but I didn't." He kept rambling.

Kensi stopped him. "It was after I met Astrid. We were playing cards in the boat shed and I was trying to get to know her. She kept avoiding all my questions, so I told her she could ask anything about me."

"What did she ask?"

"She asked me if I was in love with my partner."

"Wow."

"Again with the wow?"

"I mean, I know the girl was smart, but that was deep for a kid. How did you respond?"

"I asked her how old she was and deflected the question."

"Typical Kensi."

"I'd punch you if you weren't still recovering."

"I might deserve it."

"I guess it was at that moment, that I realized that I was. I would have been kidding myself if I didn't admit I was very much in love with you. Then I missed your birthday. I felt terrible. I felt like the worst friend ever. You kept hinting and you were so excited about it. What a jerk I was. The. To top it off, you thought I made dinner plans for us. When I got home that evening, I thought about calling or just coming over, but I didn't know how to make it better. I tossed and turned, until I realized sleep wasn't going to come."

"You texted me at 3am," he remembered "I promise to make it up to you, was all it said."

"That's right," Kensi replied. "Then, I took out my journal."

"You mean your diary," Deeks teased.

Kensi rolled her eyes. "I kept my fathers ring taped inside. I stared at it for a while and Then I took it out of the tape. I played with it in my hand. I started writing. Everything I felt about you, it poured out. I took the letter and the ring in and placed them in an envelope. The next morning, I opened the armory locker and locked the envelope inside. I wasn't sure what my next plan was at that point, but I had a feeling you found my journal. I realized It was turned upside down when I pulled it out to write that night. I didn't think you had actually read it, until a few weeks later after I had already put my plan in place." She glared. "I guess I had a feeling you might have, so I thought the armory was a safer place to keep it."

"Probably a good call," he shrugged.

"I asked Nell to keep a copy of the key. I told her back then, I wanted to keep something safe there and needed a backup key in case I lost the original. It wasn't til later, I told her the truth. I took the original key and sent it to myself in the box. I wanted to drive you crazy for a bit."

"Which you did."

"Yes, I did. I still wasn't sure about giving it to you,"

"And for the record, I called it. You sent it to yourself!" Deeks gloated.

"We kept toying around our thing, so I decided to finally put it on your desk. I thought the box inside the box and the snakes would be a good distraction if you did open it in front of Sam and Callen, but I kinda knew you wouldn't."

"You're still diabolical, yet, You know me too well."

"I didn't think it would take you six years to open. I honestly thought you'd open it when I cut the tape after the Angelo case."

"I'm pretty sure You knew how I felt by then, even as cryptic as I was. My interesting style of communication that won you over."

"I really wanted you to open it that night. I had missed you so much when I was In Afghanistan. I wanted to come back and pick up where we left off. But, you were so freaked out."

"I'm sorry, Kens."

"It still got us here, baby. Truthfully, I wouldn't change a thing."

"Neither would I."

Kensi laid her head gently on Deeks shoulder.

"Wanna go back to bed," he asked her.

"Mmmm, I'd rather have some rocky road and Oreos."

"Ok," he chuckled. "I'll bring it to you in bed. We can work on the room tomorrow."

Kensi nodded and kissed her husband. "I like the sound of that."


End file.
